[Reaves13]

I'm 13 and he's 17. I'll turn 14 in may and he'll be 18 in November. We've been friends for about 2 years but we just started dating about two months ago. He's the sweetest guy I've ever met. He's the first guy to ever actually pull out my chair for me or open and shut the car door for me. I've never met another southern gentlemen like him before. I am mature for my age so it doesn't really bother him about my age. I'm happier than ever with him. I just really dislike the age difference. My parents have met him and they do let us hang out but they won't let us go on date or anywhere by ourselves. Am I wrong for dating him?

[Justwantfair]

What does a 17 yo have in common with a 13 yo?

You are not "wrong" to date him but it is not advisable. The primary interest that a 17 yo has in a 13 yo, is not in fact dating...

Kudos, to your parents.

[Fr_Chuck]

I am sorry there is nothing in common, but this is a situation that should not happen, I can't believe a parent of a 13 year old would allow her to date a 17 year old.

[ScottGem]

At 13 you are too young to date one on one. Hanging out or "group" dating is fine. So I agree with your parents there.

However, I question the future of this relationship. The difference in your interests is a wide gap. And, this has to be mentioned, he could get into serious trouble if your relationship becomes sexual.

[45notdaddy]

Speaking as a 15 year recovered 17 year old male. (That means I'm "old") I have to say that when I was that age I was sweet to my girlfriend too. It got me what I wanted and I'm not talking about dinner and a movie.

13's just way too young to be dating a 17 year old, you're too easily manipulated and taken advantage of at that age. It's part of the reason you see all these kids lured out of their homes over the internet. Someone tells them they love them and that they can be together yadda yadda and they lose their damn minds.

He's almost a legal adult, you're barely a teenager. He'll be leaving to go to school, military, or work and you'll be 14 at which point any sexual contact can be prosecuted as statutory rape by your parents like it or not.


I should add that I've always dated within my own age group or 18+ since turning 18 myself.

[Silverfoxkit]

I'm sorry but no matter how wonderful it may seem and how you think you are feeling this is not the right decision. I was 13 once, we all where and we know what its like to be moonstruck. Your body and feelings are playing all sorts of nasty tricks on you. By the time you become 17 you will be a whole world apart from where you are now. I agree completely with notdaddy. No matter what nothing good will come of this "relationship." You are at vitally different points in your lives.

[barbiechick123]

Like almost everyone has stated above, an 18 year old shouldn't want to have anything to do with a 14 year old... It's not right. Just wait before you have a boyfriend, and if you end up having one make sure he's your age. It could end up being illegal you know.

[emmajoy14]

I have ethe exact sam eproblem. He's the nicest guy ever, but in 12 and he's 16. The legal poroblems are what ge tin my way, he thinks that kissing is illegal?? I'm so confused and if we both find this stuff than we might really help each other

[ScottGem]

i hav ethe exact sam eproblem. hes the nicest guy ever, but in 12 and he's 16. the legal poroblems are wat ge tin my way, he thinks that kissing is illegal???? im so confused and if we both find this stuff than we might really help each other

Sorry you'll get no help with this here. At 12 you shouldn't be thinking in those terms. You are still a child, whether you think so or not. ANY sexual activity with this boy could get him in jail. A 4 yr gap, while not a problem when you are both over 20 IS a big problem at your ages.

Wait a couple of years before you start thinking seriously about boys.

[J_9]

i hav ethe exact sam eproblem. hes the nicest guy ever, but in 12 and he's 16. the legal poroblems are wat ge tin my way, he thinks that kissing is illegal???? im so confused and if we both find this stuff than we might really help each other

Sorry, couldn't understand a word you typed.

[godsbabygirl267]

She typed the following,

"I have the exact same problem. He's the nicest guy ever, but I'm 12 and he is 16. The legal problems are what get in my way, he thinks that kissing is illegal? I'm so confused and if we both find this stuff then we might really help each other."

I assume she was meaning that she is in the same situation as the other girl and that neither of them knows the true legality of dating such a marginally different age group.

[aaron2baby]

What you have to think about is next year he will be 18 and you'll be 14 that's ilegal;

[aaron2baby]

I personally am a very strong believer that love can go through anything you might have to wait awhile to spend as much time with him as you want but if you both love each other you can do it let no one tell you you won't be together anything is possible my parents are 8 years apart

[liz28]

If you was my daughter you wouldn't be spending no time with this guy.

What state do you live in?

Did you know that in most states the of consent is 16. Now even though you might not be engaging in any sexual activity with him, he might get in trouble for doing something as simple as kissing you, touching you inappropriate?

However dating isn't illegal but how much dating experience do you have? You shouldn't even want to open yourself up so soon to this. Go hang out friends and get boys off your mind.

[izzieszkraszzy]

Forget what everyone else says as long as your happy don't worry I'm in the same situation he's 17 and I'm 13 and I'm very happy so forget everyone else and be happy its your live do what you want with it