[candy37128]

I am 20 years old and recently started dating this guy. He is absolutely amazing. There is one problem I am still a virgin and want to stay that way. I always told myself that I wanted to be in love when it happened. Its just really hard , I am physically very ready for it but emotionally my heart says no. I get him all riled up then I have to stop myself from going any further and always feel really bad because I can't please him. I am not for oral sex at all. What can I do?

[talaniman]

Be honest, and straight forward, and spend more time having good clean fun, and less time getting him all steamed up. Stick by your own principles, as guys can get really inventive, to get what they want, when its driven by strong sexual urges.

[A mouse]

If there's one thing I've learned in this world it's to always follow your heart. The fact of this matter is that people shouldn't have sex before marriage. If a man loves you, you want to make sure he loves you for your personality. Not your body. Follow your heart and stay away from premarital sex. Otherwise you might just end up hurting yourself in the long run.

-Mouse

[liz28]

Don't do anything until your ready for it. Do your boyfriend know you're a virgin because if he knows he should respect that.

[CrazyThumper]

If there's one thing I've learned in this world it's to always follow your heart. The fact of this matter is that people shouldn't have sex before marriage. If a man loves you, you want to make sure he loves you for your personality. Not your body. Follow your heart and stay away from premarital sex. Otherwise you might just end up hurting yourself in the long run.

-Mouse

Sorry mouse I don't agree with "The fact of this matter is that people shouldn't have sex before marriage". That may be your own persoal beliefs as well as many others but it is surely not a fact.

The only fact here is that if she is not comfortable with taking her sexual activities to the next level then don't. If he is a gentlemen and cares for you he will understand. If it doesn't work for him, then that's OK he can leave and you can find someone else that resects your wishes more. Like Tal says focus on other forms of entertainment and try to not to 'get him worked up' if you are not going to find alternative ways to satisfy him physically... nobody likes a tease either. Sex is an amazing experience, and so are the other physical connections you will make.. just do it at your own pace! You will know when your comfortable and ready..
Thump

[nikosmom]

Make sure your boyfriend knows your feelings about being sexual and he should respect you enough to not push the issue. I agree that it's not a good idea to be a tease either. Do things that take the focus away from being alone and being tempted to get intimate.

Be proud of yourself for holding out and stay true to your beliefs. The decision to become physically intimate is not one that should be taken lightly so deciding to wait until you're sure about your feelings is admirable.

[roxypox]

You should be straight forward about it. And like someone else said; don't do anything you're not ready for. When it's the right time for you, you'll know ;)

Best of luck!