[greeneyedbaby]

A couple coworkers and I have become rather close. We ask each other for advice and vent to each other when needed. I am 21. I was raised by amazing parents to be independent and work on trying to figure things out for myself. But I was also taught getting advice from someone who has been there helps a great deal as well. And since my coworkers are older than me they can be very helpful. But my fellow coworkers give me "advice" even when not asked for. And this is where the problem begins. See we all come from different backgrounds and have different values and their advice becomes well demands. And when I don't follow their orders they get extremely mad at me. And sometimes the "advice" they give isn't even the same. So in the end someone is mad at me. I'd say 95% of the time when I ask for advice I'll take it. But I have issues being ordered and demanded to do things that I don't want to do. So my question is how do I politely causing as little damage as possible tell them to back off unless I ask for help?

[artlady]

Advice is supposed to be given in a gesture of concern and friendship.It is not a do it or else proposition.

I would certainly avoid telling them anything that they feel compelled to give you advice on.If they do give advice you might say*I think I'm just going to do it my way*.

Or.. less up front but maybe more effective..

You could create a story about a friend who's best friend gets mad if she does not take her advice,hoping they see themselves in that scenario.

Add the conversation that you think people need to live and learn ,advice is good but the only way to grow is to make your own decisions.

Then you might joke around and say *kinda like you guys when I go my own way*.Keep it lighthearted and maybe you can avoid any more conflict.Let them know advice is good but should never be a demand.
Good luck!

[Fr_Chuck]

Guess that is why I don't make friends at work. But you stand up for yourself, and tell them thank you for the advice but you have to make your own choices