[LaLaLa24]

Hi, okay I feel odd doing this, but friends and people you know aren't always who you need to hear an answer from.
So I have been dating this guy for 6 years after 2 years he asked me to marry him... I said No, I simply knew I wasn't ready, but I did love him. Our relationship has been up and down, but when we were faced with complications we took them head on and defeated them! About 2 years ago he developed an addiction to pain medication, Vicodin led to Percocet led to Oxy and so on. At first I believed he was really in pain and needed this, but than he started taking 9-14 pills at a time! And if he didn't have any pills he would either not get out of bed or when he did he was miserable to everyone around him! Mostly me and our children. I tried to talk to him about it and begged him to get help or let me get him help, but as every user HE DID NOT HAVE A PROBLEM. After a year went by I knew I couldn't expose our children to this or myself. He was spending all of our money! (i.e. an Oxycontin is usually $1 a m.g. and he was taking 2/80m.g.=$160.00 a couple times a day) So me and our 2 young children moved out, I was devastated, how did I lose the man I love so much to drugs? And mostly How can he choose drugs over his children?
Anyway we ended up getting back together 5 months later. We had gone to the doctors together for him to get him help, I even left our children in my mother's care for 2 months so I could help him get clean. (that was very difficult)! In the end he did come clean. And than he saw how wrong his decisions were.
Now we have been back together for almost a year and he hasn't touched any pain meds, he looks healthier, and is no longer sick from withdrawals. But this man I have loved all this time is not the same man to me anymore! I don't feel as if I even love him, or maybe I just tucked it away if that's possible. I guess my question is, is it impossible to stop loving after u have loved someone this long? I use to see us growing old, now I cannot even imagine a future with us. Is it possible that after all we have been through just pushed me to the point of not being able to love him like I use to? Please help!!

[talaniman]

Maybe you have been through too much and need a good break.

Many who are caregivers feel different, once the patient recovers.

[LostLoveToDrugs]

Oh man, I totally feel your pain. I have been with my girlfriend since August 2005, and I just recently lost her, due to her "party" stage, but I'm pretty sure she's addicted to ecstacy. I feel really bad not having her like I use too. I have no choice but to leave her, and I love her so much, but she isn't that girl I once fell in love with, and I don't think I will love her like I did before she used X.
I hate drugs for changing people! I do believe you can stop loving someone after so many years together. It won't be easy, but its possible.

[amicon]

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