[roxypox]

Lately I've been struggling (its just getting worse and worse), I do see a psychologist every 2 or 3 weeks... and I have an appointment Friday the 27th and I will talk about this then as well, but right now I really don't know what to do...

Since July 2008 I have had some really bad life experiences, and I've made some bad decisions... and right now I can't stand being in the city where I live. Of course it has not all been bad,there have been good times as well

6 weeks ago I was out with some friends and my sister. She went home before me and when I walked home this guy started walking after me. There where no people around and I dropped my phone on the ground and couldn't turn it back on, I lost sight of him for a bit and thought I had shaken him. Suddenly he grabs a hold of my wrist and he just walked next to me all the way home. I tried to talk to him but he didn't speak english, he didn't speak norwegian and he didn't even let go once I started crying. When I came home my neighbor was on his balcony ( I live 1st floor in an apartment building) and he let me climb over the railing (I couldn't find my keys) the guy got into the building but left once I got in to the apartment and closed the door.

The only thing he could understand was the sentence; don't you have somewhere to sleep? Don't you have somewhere to go? And he said no. He didn't hurt me and did seem to only be after a place to sleep. But since this, I don't know I really don't feel safe anywhere... I don't dare to walk out side once its dark. Not even to be in front of the windows.

Lately my solution to this has been to escape the city, every week I go back to my home town and stay there when ever I can. (I only work part time) and I haven't been focusing on my school work at all. I just have no want to or focus. And I really don't know how to get focused. Its like I've just given up. When I'm in my home town I hang out with this new guy and my best friend, and all my other friends and family who live there and I do fine... I relax, I'm calm, I'm not as depressed as I am here...

Whenever I'm home I just grow more and more depressed for every hour I spend here... and I've even decided to move back to my home town (which I nevre thought I would do) but I share an apt with my little sis and our contract isn't up until the end of December, and our rent is so high that I can't get anyone we know to move in... and I know that moving out now seems like the best option, but my sister wouldn't understand... and it doesn't seem fair to just leave her in the lurch like that! And quite honestly I'm not ready to move away from her either... she's 5 hyears younger then me and I moved away from home when she was 14, and I didn't really get to know her until we moved in together at the beginning of last year...

I don't know what to do... does anyone have any advice?

. In advance; thanks!

Roxy

[albear]

Sorry to hear about that experience, maybe you should tell this to your psychologist and see what they suggest.

You sound a little home sick to be honest and that maybe the problem. But maybe you need a break, a holiday, some time to yourself and forget about the world spinning around you, so that you can calm down and relax, because you sound really wound up, then you'll be in a better position to lok at what you're worried about and resolve them, would that be a viable option for you?

And I don't mean to go back to your home town.

[roxypox]

I think you're right. I do think I'm very home sick. It just creeped up on me even before this. My psychologist and I talked about me wanting to go back home and she said that it wasn't that unnatural for my age, she thinks I'm getting ready to settle down and I think she's right. (lol I never thought I'd get there)

But yeah I do think you're right about me being wound up. I've been so busy for so long (years) and I've never actually slowed down and taken a look around and lately (being home sick) I've started to do that and I must say I'm just not happy with my life here... its just so empty and as of late I just think this city is cold and kind of hard and I really just miss the warmth from the people back home. And that incident was just the last straw I think. I've also been thinking (after this incident) that this city is not somewhere I would raise kids... plain and simple. I've lived here for 7 years come August and I think that's enough.

Thank you so much for your advice it was wonderful to hear someone's opinion on this and when easter comes up I'm going to et a way and take a little break from all the crazyness ;)

(and I will def. talk to my psychologist about this subject )

[albear]

No worries roxy, glad to be of some help :)

Psychologist are funny creatures aren't they, but they do give out good advice.

Have a nice holiday sa'll right for some :D