[Bulova]

I'm 17 ( I'll be 18 in 2 months ) and I haven't had friends since elementary school. I'm home schooled now ( since middle school ) and all my previous friends have moved or we just grew apart. For a long time I've been really depressed and lonely and I'm really sick of feeling that way. Now I feel like I'm ready to just go out there and meet new people but I don't know where to start. Since I'm not in a school what do I do? And once I do meet new people how do I overcome my shyness? I took a summer trip with other people my age and had a hard time. When I'm with one other person I do fine in a conversation but when it's a group I just can't keep up with the conversation for some reason, especially when they start talking about school and relationships ( never had a relationship either and I'm extremely uncomfortable around guys ). I know a lot of it is in my head cause when I'm with my cousins or other family I'm really outgoing and crazy, I just don't know how to let go in front of others.

[Clough]

Hi, Bulova!

Being shy can take some time and a lot of practice to overcome it. I have an activity that we could do on this site that might help you to get over your depression. If you're interested as to what it is and might like to try it, please let me know.

In many communities where people are home-schooled, the parents get together with other parents who also home-school their children in order to share academically and socially. Does that sort of thing happen with you?

I used to get really bad anxiety attacks when I had to interact with a group of people. It took me a long time to get over it, but it can be done.

Hopefully, others will also be along to address your question.

Thanks!

[captainpecan]

Your in a tough spot. I have a really good friend that was home schooled also. He is over 30 now, and doing fine. But it was very difficult for him to break out of his shell also. You see, there are many benefits to home schooling, but it does cause you to miss some very important social lessons as you grow up. Sometimes a bad lesson is just as important as the good ones. I have some good suggestions that may help, but to be honest, I think I will leave this one to those who know better. I will see if I can get my friend to come over to this forum and post also, as he worked really hard to overcome his extreme shyness, and eventually married and now has 3 kids and appears to be happy. Keep your head up!

[dontknownuthin]

There are a lot of home school organizations that plan social things for the kids so they do not experience this kind of isolation so look into whether you can get into something like that. Also consider whether it would be good for you to go to a public school to finish high school. You are close to the end, so it might be hard to do now, but it's always an option.

If you plan to go to college, that's a great opportunity to meet people. Another way is to get a part-time job where other young people work. Meeting people in school or work is ideal because you have something in common right off the bat.

If you are involved in a church, join the young adult or teen club and try to take on a leadership role either for the whole group or just a project. That will put you in a position where people will have to get to know you in order to do the project or be part of the group, and you will have some built-in socializing as a result.

Even if you are still working on high school you could probably sign up for one or two community college classes. It would be a good way to get a taste of going to school with other people again, and it's not nearly as hard to socialize with adults as with high schoolers. YOu will find adult students tend to be less judgemental and less into their own little cliques.

Basically you have to get out of the house and go where the people are!