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    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Mar 9, 2009, 12:05 AM
    Complicated Child Support Situation
    Both my ex and I live in NYS. My ex does not currently pay child support (there is no order yet) and I'm not sure it would be worth it to take him to court. This is the situation. MY ex is now married to a woman who has been diagnosed with cancer. Neither my ex or his wife work. Their only income is her disability and charity. Now here's my question. Since my ex chooses not to work, will the courts use his wife's income to calculate child support? I'm worried that they will gain sympathy with the judge due to the cancer and I will be wasting my time taking him to court. I've let him not pay up until now because I always fall for his sob stories. It's just that it's getting to the point that I am having a hard time making ends meet. I would appreciate input from anyone familiar with the child support laws in New York
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #2

    Mar 9, 2009, 06:08 AM

    What a judge will do as far as how its determined can't be predicted. He may set it at minimum wage and he starts going into arrears right away is the most likely route.
    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Mar 9, 2009, 06:50 PM

    Thanks Calif. That's pretty much the answer I expected, but not the one I was hoping for. I have a related question then... I have heard of situations where they base the payments on potential earning income. Would it be worth it to get a lawyer and try for this?
    twinkiedooter's Avatar
    twinkiedooter Posts: 12,172, Reputation: 1054
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    #4

    Mar 9, 2009, 07:26 PM

    Her income has nothing to do with his ability to pay child support. They are his kids and not her kids and her income will not be factored into his obligations.
    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Mar 9, 2009, 07:55 PM

    I guess they found a pretty good loophole then. I was told by my ex that his wife doesn't want him to work so he doesn't have to pay any substantial child support. Thanks for your response Twinkie
    twinkiedooter's Avatar
    twinkiedooter Posts: 12,172, Reputation: 1054
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    #6

    Mar 9, 2009, 08:00 PM

    I'd go for the minimum amount from him whether he has a job or not. He's being a real jerk skating under the wire. Don't let him. He does not have the cancer, she does. What's he going to do when she's not there any longer? Get something ordered by the court and make him pay. It's not your child's fault he's married to someone who has cancer. Don't let your child be denied the financial support he's entitled to.
    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Mar 9, 2009, 08:14 PM

    Actually funny you should ask lol. They have a child together, and since they are married he will receive social security for both himself and their son should she ever pass away. So he still won't have to work. I have every intention of getting the order. I just didn't know if it would be worth me spending a lot on legal representation if the court was most likely only going to give me $50 a month. It would take me over two years to get back from him what I paid for a lawyer.
    twinkiedooter's Avatar
    twinkiedooter Posts: 12,172, Reputation: 1054
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    #8

    Mar 9, 2009, 09:06 PM

    Contact your local child support office first and see if they can do this for you.
    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Mar 9, 2009, 09:29 PM

    Ask them if they can do what?
    lucytwo2's Avatar
    lucytwo2 Posts: 57, Reputation: 2
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    #10

    Mar 10, 2009, 02:54 PM

    You don't need a lawyer for family court.Usually they are very helpful in helping you fill out the papers.Whats wrong with him that he doesn't want to work.I guess that's in your favor that you aren't with him any longer.Your child should not be denied just because their father is married to someone with cancer.Oh well,boo who to him.He needs to support the child that he fathered no matter what the situation.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #11

    Mar 10, 2009, 04:53 PM

    NYS has programs for child support collection. I don't believe there is anything out of pocket for it. You just need to fill out papers to get it started.
    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Mar 10, 2009, 08:55 PM

    Thanks everyone for all the helpful information! I will be calling the child support office on Thursday to get the ball rolling. We actually have 2 kids together. Oh, and he doesn't work because his wife doesn't want him to have to pay child support. This is what I was told by him anyway.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,305, Reputation: 7692
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    #13

    Mar 10, 2009, 09:07 PM

    If there is no child support order, is there even a child custody order done in the court ( since normally you do them at the same time)

    Child support collections has to have a court order to collect from?? Would not legal aid if they can't afford an attorney be the first stop to file and get a court order for support.
    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #14

    Mar 10, 2009, 09:15 PM

    Actually in NYS they are handled as completely separate issues. You have to file them individually. He actually took me to court for visitation claiming that I was keeping the kids from him (I wasn't and never had). He then received the "typical" visitation of every other weekend and one night a week for 4 hours. He opts to only take them over night Sat-Sun every other weekend. He also has the option of getting extended visits on school breaks and has refused each time I offer. The reason I didn't put in a request for child support at that time was that I didn't want the judge to think I was being vindictive in asking for child support because he was asking for visitation.
    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #15

    Mar 10, 2009, 09:17 PM
    Sorry. I didn't read the second part of your post Fr. I know I don't need a lawyer to file the petition. I just didn't know if a lawyer would be able to possibly get a higher amount awarded. If they go with his income being zero, I will, at most get $50 a month
    logicalthinker's Avatar
    logicalthinker Posts: 58, Reputation: 1
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    #16

    Mar 22, 2009, 09:05 PM

    Does anyone know how long it takes the court (typically) to notify the parties of the court date? I was told when I filed that it would be mailed to by myself and my ex.

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