[Natpink]

Well Ive been wondering. In this situation.
I was talking to this guy and we automatically clicked and due to that I started liking him.I was scared to open up and tell him but one day I did and he made it so easy for me to do so. I thought there was a chance but it didn't happen, I let time pass and we are very good friends I opened up again and I would get the excuse of I'm don't want a serious relationship.But after we ended being really good friends and with benefits.Time passed and he was like I need a break I was like OK but this time I decided to call quits and I stopped talking ti him for like 8 months now he's different but I still like him.. my question is why after a while a long while is he back?

[talaniman]

He wants more of your benefits! That simple.

By the way, females play this game as much as guys do.

Try talking, without benefits and see what you both really feel, besides lust.

[kp2171]

why do guys come back after they say they want a break?

this isn't a "guy" thing. Id say, without running numbers, that there are more guys here asking the same thing about women they've been with, who want to "explore" or who don't want a serious relationship, but who also keep hanging around for attention.

another generalization I can't substantiate with numbers is id say when the girl keeps yo-yoing back and forth, she's back for the mental security and comfort. When the guy is back, he's also interested in the mental side, but sex seems to be a bigger player.

not saying at all that all men are more interested in sex than women... but in these cases where there's a break... I think affirmation through physical touch seems bigger for the guys.

anyway... the mixed messages "we can't be together... lets get together" situation isn't gender specific.

as for your question... only he can really answer it. I'm sure he misses the benefits. There's nothing wrong with missing sex. But I don't think you can make any assumptions about why he is back. Is it because he wants to take things up a level? Because he's bored and you are a nice diversion? Because he misses being in control?

again... lots of reasons he could be back. Time for you two to talk things out. If you can't talk to him, or trust his answers, well... there you go.

I had two relationship bounce back and forth between dating and not dating. One girl kept coming back because she needed the emotional boost. The other girl just loved sex, and we had a great time in bed, even if other areas weren't quite matched up later in the relationship.

so... wish we could give an answer that wasn't just random guessing and unsubstantiated opinions. He could have an honest change of heart. He could be the same guy. He could be worse than you expect.

how hard is he willing to work to be with you? What is he asking of you? How hard is he willing to chase you? That's a start. That said, some just love the chase, so, again... no definitive answer given here, I guess.

I'm still working on mind reading skills. Ill let you know when I get there. Don't stay up.