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    kentkane45's Avatar
    kentkane45 Posts: 8, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Feb 21, 2009, 10:10 AM
    How do I become finacialy seporated from wife In SC
    How do I become financially seporated from wife In SC

    I've been married for 18 years and need to get out a destructive marriage. I am the sole income provider except for about 5K (my wife has a part time job) our kids are 21 and 16.
    My wife is has severe depression that I have lived with for years and now is going out drinking 3-4 time a week getting home sometimes the next day. Our 16 year old is daughter has distanced herself from the family stays with friends every chance she gets.
    Its time for a real change and I just need help to get the ball rolling. I don't drink and have a great stable career and would like to save my 16 year old daughter from the destructive path she is on.
    Please help!
    George_1950's Avatar
    George_1950 Posts: 3,099, Reputation: 236
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    #2

    Feb 21, 2009, 10:16 AM

    Here's a FAQ page from a SC attorney's web site. You have a 'complicated' case, not a 'simple' one. I would suggest you read all you can on the subject, but get professional legal assistance.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Feb 21, 2009, 10:21 AM

    Let me see you file for divorce, file for custody of the 16 year old.
    Though your attorney you will work out a fair settlement with your ex, normal spouse support for a number of years.
    George_1950's Avatar
    George_1950 Posts: 3,099, Reputation: 236
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    #4

    Feb 21, 2009, 10:47 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck View Post
    ... normal spouse support for a number of years.
    What if kent ain't wanting to pay spouse support?
    GeorgeMcCasland's Avatar
    GeorgeMcCasland Posts: 42, Reputation: -5
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    #5

    Mar 21, 2009, 12:50 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by kentkane45 View Post
    My wife is has severe depression that I have lived with for years and now is going out drinking 3-4 time a week getting home sometimes the next day.
    Divorce should be your backup plan, not your main option. If her drinking is becoming a significant problem, you could file a restraining order, removing her from the home, ordering her into counseling and an alcohol treatment program, along with court supervised visitation with the child. Yes, the teenager is still a child and must follow the directions of her parents. She won't like it, but if the mother is actively making an effort, it makes for a good example for the child. Further, it acts as a reminder to the mother that there are reasons for making the effort.

    It's always best for the children, regardless of their age, to see their parents together.

    Ten Stupid Things Couples do to Mess up Their Relationships

    Stupid Things Parents Do to Mess Up Their Kids

    Stanford University
    Divorce, Nontraditional Families, and Its Consequences For Children
    "We know that children of divorced parents have more emotional and behavioral problems and do less well in school than children who live with both their Parent."


    A Child's Choice: What Is The Right Age For A Child To Choose Which Parent To Live With?

    Stay Married & Save The Planet

    Divorce Rates Drop as Couples Stay Together Due to Tight Finances

    In the meantime, you do make preparations in the event she does refuse to work on getting better. I assume you have concerns with paying alimony. That is an interpretive factor that the judge will decide on. Since she is working part time, and there are no young dependent children, the judge may see that she can work full time and support herself.

    ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
    I’ve been a Father’s Rights Advocate for 20 years.

    Many think the courts are rigged against dads, but in reality, it is more about attorneys unwilling or lacking the knowledge to truly fight for the father's rights. This is why it is important to learn how to interview and hire the right attorney. It is also important to do as much as possible on your own and not pay the attorney to do it.

    Part of the problem with getting your rights knowing what to do to prove your case, and how to remind the judge of their responsibilities. Let me start with the judge.

    Always take people with you to court who are not there to testify. Make sure they are sitting where the judge can see them, each equipped with a tablet and pen to take notes. It’s best to use a Court Watch Form designed for this purpose. I have one in the manual at Dads House.

    If the judge is not doing his job, using the info from this form, you can, appeal, and/or get the judge sanctioned and removed from the case. You file a complaint with the State Supreme Court at your state capital.

    Start keeping a daily journal of all your activities. The most common way to prevent a father from getting his rights through the courts is a false allegation, usually sexual. Over 60% of divorcing father are accused of child sexual abuse, of which only 4% are found to have any relevance, but there are no penalties for doing so. A daily journal is your number one piece of evidence in court and you can even refer to it while on the stand.

    Gather evidence. Check the site below to see if it is illegal to record conversations without the other person knowing. If your state does not have a law either way, than it defaults to the federal ruling which says one person in a conversation must know they are being recorded. You’re that one person. In Missouri it is specifically legal, in Kansas there is no mention either way. If you live in two different states, and one has a law against it, than it applies when the call originates from within that state,
    "Can We Tape?"

    Now, you can't just record, you also have to transcribe it into the daily journal.

    If you want to learn how to do all this go to Dads House in Yahoo Groups. There's an educational manual in the file section that can teach you what you need to know. The file is too large to attach here. Take the time to learn what you can and should do.

    DadsHouse : Building a Shelter for Fathers/Children
    GiveKidsAChoice : Bird Nest Custody
    Fathers & Families
    Parental Alienation and Parental Alienation Syndrome Home Page

    :rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes: :rolleyes:

    On final item, your 16-year-old.

    I imagine your daughter thinks she's almost an adult. You can remind her that the only reason girls become legal adults at age 18 is because the boys are, but the boys only get it because they have to register for the Draft. If she's adamant about her being almost an adult, she should be fighting for the right of women to register for the Draft.

    She and her friends can REGISTER HERE, but they may need to do a little civil disobedience by selecting male rather than female. When you select female it diverts to another page.

    As for maturity, Christ Jesus was not mature enough to leave home and make his own decisions until age 30.

    Attached is a chart you can show her of just how little time you have control, of her life, compared to how much time she has to do whatever she wants

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