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    summertyme's Avatar
    summertyme Posts: 46, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #1

    Feb 16, 2009, 07:03 AM
    Men and Marriage
    Should a Christian man get fully aroused when looking at a woman that he may find attractive? Someone he likes and thinks he is going to marry?

    Is this sinning?
    De Maria's Avatar
    De Maria Posts: 1,359, Reputation: 52
    Ultra Member
     
    #2

    Feb 16, 2009, 03:37 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by summertyme View Post
    Should a Christian man get fully aroused when looking at a woman that he may find attractive?
    Normally, that type of arousal is an indication of lust. Lust is the desire to use something or someone regardless of what that person or anyone thinks about the matter. The only one gratified by the lusting desire is the one who lusts.

    Someone he likes and thinks he is going to marry?
    One can lust even for one whom he loves. That is why so many marriages end disastrously. The party who is in lust, mistakes his/her lust for love. As soon as that lust dissipates, they feel betrayed and go in search of a more sexually exciting partner.

    Is this sinning?
    Lusting is a sin.

    Too many people confuse lust with love.

    Love is the desire to please someone in every way, including sexually.

    Lust is the desire to please yourself at your partner's expense.

    I suggest you read this book:
    Ascension Press: Catholic books and Adult Faith Formation programs

    And this one. I haven't read this one, but I have faith in the author:
    Ascension Press: Catholic books and Adult Faith Formation programs

    His website is also real good:
    Christopher West Home

    I hope that helps.

    Sincerely,

    De Maria
    adam7gur's Avatar
    adam7gur Posts: 372, Reputation: 38
    Full Member
     
    #3

    Feb 17, 2009, 02:13 AM

    I think it is best to deal with this woman and see where it is going.That would probably control the flesh.Since the flesh is allowed to make thoughts , it responds in that way.
    One of the reasons we marry is also to please our flesh , cover its needs.
    If someone understands that the needs of the flesh are taking over him/her then it is time to find a wife/husband.

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