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    Penguinio's Avatar
    Penguinio Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Feb 15, 2009, 01:54 AM
    Christian - My best friend feels as if she is homosexual.
    My best friend feels as if she is a homosexual.

    I'll put one thing out there - I know she doesn't like me as anything more than a friend, and I have a boyfriend who I'm very happy with...
    Anyway,
    She doesn't want to be that way and she would never act on it ever.

    But she is a very sensitive person and I find that she is always ringing me and getting offended when I don't answer [even if I'm at work] and always starts fights over small things because what I do apparently hurts her..
    She even says to me that she'd be happy talking to me on the phone all day everyday.
    And I'm the opposite, as much as she is the greatest friend. I can go a week without speaking to her and still feel as close. But she can't go a day she says.. but speaking to my friends everyday with my busy schedule gets overwhelming and because she is sensitive sometimes it can be hard to talk to her when I'm in a bad mood because she will ALWAYS get offfended by something.

    She knows all this and feels horrible because she can see that things are in "reverse" for her, but she also says she can't help it and she manages the way she treats her friends as if a straight person would treat their boyfriend.. because when I think about it if I didn't speak to my boyfriend most days I would feel more distant from him so I can't understand how she can feel that way about her friends if things are truly in reverse..
    But
    I feel as if I'm managing two relationships, I'm not just going to let go of the friendship.. because I am a christian and believe that we're meant to be friends..
    But I don't know what to do. Because its pushing me away and I know that's not right..
    And I've told her all this and its cooling down but it can never change fully.. but I really don't know what to do?
    HELP!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Feb 15, 2009, 10:19 AM

    She has issues she needs to deal with, and since you can't help, tell her that, and back away.
    Homegirl 50's Avatar
    Homegirl 50 Posts: 10,794, Reputation: 2604
    Dating & Teen Expert
     
    #3

    Feb 15, 2009, 10:24 AM

    Sounds like she has issues that you are not equipped to deal with. Tell her you think it would be a good idea for her to maybe get some counseling, that you cannot be the help she needs, then step back.

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