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bob2323 · Feb 10, 2009, 05:41 AM

My son an his wife are there 2nd child in march they have a 16 month old now. This has been very stressful for the mother she thought of abortion but decided against it. She feels she can't care for both baby's an want to give the new born up for adoption. My son has hoped she would have a change in her feelings but it has not changed she has not told anyone she's pregnet. I guess its to hard for her to deal with everyone's feelings on this. My son told me an I asked him if I could talk to her she wanted to talk to me an was sorry she was hurting my son an his family with her feelings. I offered to help in any way for them to keep the baby I am in ny they are in California. She just feels she can't do it I was thinking about adopting the new born an maybe in a few years they would be better settled for there child . What would I have to do an my sons family for this to work I would need to do it legally so I could cover the child on ins an be able to let them take there child back if they choose to. How exspensive dose this have to be because all the parties will agree on the terms that will be needed they need help an outside adoption might not be the best idea.

Synnen · Feb 10, 2009, 06:43 AM

Your son can prevent an outside adoption simply by refusing to sign relinquishment papers. As long as they are married, he automatically has rights once the child is born.

As far as your plan goes--you need to talk to a lawyer. There are too many things that can go wrong in a custody/guardianship/adoption situation to NOT have a lawyer going into it.

tickle · Feb 10, 2009, 06:49 AM

I applaud your decision to adopt your grandchild. It can be easy doing this, and making this decision and you are obviously giving it a lot of thought. Not having been in your shoes, I can only offer a website that gives information that you seek. If you find it isn't enough, then it will probably give you leads to follow and sources to access which will eventually put you in the right spot to your result. Good luck, my prayers are with you and hope it will work out they way you plan.

www.adopting.org/adoptions/grandparent-adoption