[marci christen]

My step children came to live with me from another state six months ago. Their mother has no where to live, is not stable, does not want them back, but is guilting them, bribing them, and really confusing them with every phone call she makes. The nine year old is so confused and is acting out, and just got a three day suspension from school today. The 14 year old is just plain lazy and is addicted to video games so bad he can't function. I have taken the video games away to try to get him social, but he refuses to do anything. Neither of the boys want to move back in with their mother, but she won't give us custody of them either. She lives in Louisiana, I live in Mississippi. I have stayed on the phone all day trying to get help for these children but because of the custody status and the fact that the two state laws for this sort of thing is so different, no one can help. I just want the children evaluated so I will be prepared in court when we do go for full custody. She sent them a cell phone so she could talk to them with out having to use my house phone so I nor their father can hear or monitor the conversations. I do not want to send these children back to their mother but it is really disrupting my household. I have two girls too and I feel like they are getting the short end of this stick because I have to spend so much time with the boys. I truly don'tknow what I can or can not do.

Please help

Marci

[hoightoider]

I thought it was interesting you never once mentioned your husband in all of this.

I had three step children who I thought I could help put their lives on a better track; foolish me. Their behavior was too ingrained to change.

My advice is be very careful you don't sacrifice your daughters for these step children.

[Choux]

This is a really bad idea. You have two girls who are in danger of sexual abuse by these troubled boys.

Send the kids back, is my opinion.

Best wishes, :)

[ladylavender1]

I would recommend family therapy as a start, and individual therapy for the Boys. Your whole family is affected by this. I would also find a good lawyer wh can tell you your options and help develop a plan of action.

[nitelight198073]

What does that have to do with anything they are having troubles does that automatically make them sexual predators I think not my mother treated me like crap and I didn't go out and rape anyone

[liz28]

What does the father say and do about their behavior? Everyone need to sit down and set rules and consequences if the rules aren't follow in a civil matter.

Also, set time for family meeting where everyone can talk about their feelings openly. But the father must take part in this too. The two of you have to work together as a team to enforce things.

Who knows what the mother is telling them or their feelings towards the move.