Can he take my son

meagan1989 · Jan 13, 2009, 01:09 PM

:(:mad::confused:I would like to know something that is very important. Back in 2007 in July I meet this guy on my 18th birthday.Well we dated for a month or so and a couple weeks later i found out that i was pregnant. We were together for awhile then he gets ups in leaves out of the blue, I contacted him one time and asked him if he would send dome money for me to get to the doctors for the baby he agreed that he would send me some money that he would call me after he got off work, well needless to say he never called me and when i called him he ignored my phone calls so I did not call him again for a while. Then in Dec. or Jan i try to call him because i was having complications with my pregnancy well when i called i was giving the the message ( THE NUMBER YOU HAVE REACHED IS NO LONGER AVAILABLE). So i could not do anything on trying to contact him because i have no idea where he lives. Then in i think march of 08 his daughter contacts me and we were talking and he came in there and told her get off the phone with me and that she was not allowed to speak to me, and then said in the back ground tell that b*tch not to be calling my phones again, well not to long after that i tried to contact the daughters phone and that number i had been disconnected so what should i do.

To my ?

I t has been almost a year now on the 26th of feb. and he is trying to get custody of my son but he has yet to try to help provide for him or come and see him see i still leave in the same house that he stayed in with me and he has not once to come see if i had the baby. What should i do in this situation please help :( :confused::mad:

stevetcg · Jan 13, 2009, 01:34 PM

How is he trying to get custody? Has he gone to court to file for paternity or is he just talking smack?

Frankly, he is very unlikely to get custody. He may get some visitation and he WILL be ordered to pay support.

meagan1989 · Jan 13, 2009, 01:47 PM

Originally Posted by stevetcg

How is he trying to get custody? Has he gone to court to file for paternity or is he just talking smack?

Frankly, he is very unlikely to get custody. He may get some visitation and he WILL be ordered to pay support.

He has mad threats that he was going to court and that I would be served with papers, but I don't see were I have done anything wrong I have tried to get a hold of him during and after my pregnancy.:(

meagan1989 · Jan 13, 2009, 01:52 PM

Originally Posted by stevetcg

How is he trying to get custody? Has he gone to court to file for paternity or is he just talking smack?

Frankly, he is very unlikely to get custody. He may get some visitation and he WILL be ordered to pay support.

oh and thanks you have taken away a lot of stress. Also what should I do for rmy part if he does go throug with what would I need in order to prove to them that it is in the child's est interest to stay in my care see the reason I was trying to also contact him was because my son was born 3 months premature and he was in the hospital for 2 1/2 almost 3 months and I want ed to let him know so was it good on part that I tried to contact him so that I have proof that I did try to contact him

cdad · Jan 13, 2009, 01:56 PM

Originally Posted by meagan1989

He has mad threats that he was going to court and that i would be served with papers, but i dont see were i have done anything wrong i have tried to get a hold of him during and after my pregnancy.:(

You need to go to court NOW. You need to file for full custody NOW. You need to file for child support NOW. Don't wait. This isn't a game. Get it done before its too late.

stevetcg · Jan 13, 2009, 01:56 PM

Originally Posted by meagan1989

He has mad threats that he was going to court and that i would be served with papers, but i dont see were i have done anything wrong i have tried to get a hold of him during and after my pregnancy.:(

The papers you will be served are a paternity claim. Basically it will say that you have to bring the baby in for a DNA test.

You have done nothing wrong. HE has, but that's not the issue. Most areas will consider the mother's desire for primary custody above all else. Assuming you aren't smoking crack while breast feeding, he won't have much ground to request full custody.

As it has been over a year and the child doesn't know him from Adam, he will likely only get short supervised visitation at first.

And even better news, depending on where you live, he might owe back child support to your child's date of birth.

If you want this on your terms, I would go to the court and file for custody and support. They will order that he takes a DNA test and assuming he is the father, set up a support schedule for him. If he wants visitation, he can ask for it at this point.

Bottom line: you are the mother and the custodial parent for the last year. Unless you are sitting in a boat doing smack with Satan while bio-pop walks on water, no one is getting custody from you.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 13, 2009, 02:15 PM

Most likely he never has done anything except to threaten you, may bad fathers do this to scare you from doing anything and to try and control you.

You file in court for custody, and you file for child support against him

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