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blue_st4r · Jan 2, 2009, 11:34 PM

Im a guy who has a problem with reality. I try and postpone everything. I leave everything to the last moment and do a half hearted job. Im going through depression. Im failing almost everything at university. The highest mark I got last year was a C+. Prior to that I was doing another degree.. I falied all 4 papers in semester1, repeated all in semester2 and failed/abandoned university for the rest of that semester.

My parents have asked me to move out since I'm not helping them in any chores at home nor am I being open to them. My parents have started calling me names and are bitterly angry because of me liaing all the time. They had no idea that I changed courses and stuff.

I don't see myself being anything in future. Not ever a toilet cleaner. I have no faith or believe in what I do. Im only living for others. People ask me what sort of jobs I want to do and I go blank. I can't think of what I'll be doing 2 months down the track due to this enormous un-certainty of my skills.

My self-esteem has never been higher than 0. Im scared that Im going to fail this year too and Im going to have to do something else. Im wasting government and family resources and money.
Im not lazy, I just don't have any motivation to be anyone. I seriously consider leaving education and working full-time doing any job everyday. I cannot do that too for some reason. I don't know what to do. Im only 20 years old. I will bring a lot of shame to myself and my family if I don't get a qualification.

Please help, Im stuck in my life doing nothing.

Wondergirl · Jan 2, 2009, 11:43 PM

Are you at university now? Do you have a guidance counselor or is there a counseling office? If so, will you tell them all that you told us?

blue_st4r · Jan 3, 2009, 01:09 AM

I am at university now. My career counselor would suggest something and I would show interest and then have ommitment issues down the track.

Clough · Jan 3, 2009, 01:30 AM

Hi, blue_st4r!

A big part of life is about making choices. Your parents aren't going to be around forever and sooner or later, you're going to need to carve out a niche for yourself in life on your own.

Have you ever gone to a medical professional and gotten a diagnosis for what might be happening with you? I want to emphasize the word "might" here.

I can identify with being depressed and I also "fly by the seat of my pants" a lot of times when I need to do things.

Thanks!

blue_st4r · Jan 3, 2009, 02:42 AM

I haven't seen a medical practitioner yet. My counselor at university said I have mild depression. But Its gotten worse since holidays amd I didn't mention all of this to the counselor. Maybe I should talk to a gp and see what they reccomand.

Clough · Jan 3, 2009, 02:48 AM

It would be best to speak with a gp concerning your depression. There are meds for depression that can do wonders with how you feel and think. I was on one type of medication for depression for a number of years. It really helped to straighten me out.

If you get prescribed a medication, it doesn't necessarily mean that you have to be on it for the rest of your life.

blue_st4r · Jan 3, 2009, 03:17 AM

Can you tell me something about medication. You are like the gazillionth person recommending medication. Is it prescribed? You speak totally for it..

Clough · Jan 3, 2009, 04:08 AM

It's possible that you might not need medication. But, listening to a professional who has your best interests in mind and doing the things that he or she suggests is something that I would strongly recommend.

It could just simply be a matter of you making the best choices for yourself concerning what you do day-by-day and formatting a "business plan" for your life.

I have to "kick" myself and "jump-start" myself on most days. There's no one else who's going to do it for me. Parents are long gone. Own my own home. Am entirely self-employed. In order to maintain me, it's all up to me. Again, there's no one else who's going to do it for me...

I would like to share something with you here that might hit home for you...

A few decades ago, when I was in my twenties, I was complaining and bemoaning about a number of things to my mother. One thing that really hit home for me, and that I'll never forget, was when she said that "How you deal with the problems is part of what determines the kind of man that you are".

I'll always remember those words!

Just some food for thought... Please think about it.

Thanks!

Choux · Jan 3, 2009, 02:04 PM

Are you involved in drugs, alcohol, porn/masturbation or computer games. These activities may eat away at you leaving lethargy and perhaps, depression.

Or, have you thought that you might be afraid to grow up because you had an easy life growing up and giving parents? You may not want the responsibility of taking care of yourself, having a career, and making a go of life on your own.

My opinion is that your best bet is to get professional help so you can find out what your problem is.

Best wishes to you in the future, :)

chrissymarie · Jan 6, 2009, 03:24 PM

Your not stuck at all. Your chosing ti be a failure. People like you with all the resources in the world to be somebody of importance in this worl but decide to do nothing with your rexources make me very angry. If your wasting your parents money and the governments money why don't you ask your parents to start donating that money to someone who needs it i.e. children starving in Africa, orphans in Brazil, homeles here in the US etc etc. I'm sure they'll be happy to know there helping someone who wants help.

You sound spoiled to me and you need a fat slap of reality. Continue down your path of destruction and when you are working a sucky job and living in a sucky apartment with no family... you'll want to be somebody.