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amichio · Dec 16, 2008, 03:58 AM

I don't usually do this and my friends told me I have a habit of getting to obsessive, but I met this girl at my uni an we kind of got on well, an then like one day we made out, an I thought it was quite special, but after that she seemed to get distant an like well she said point blank I don't want anything, she didn't want to go deeper, because she got hurt in a previous relationship, but the point is I like her lots an I just don't know what to do, I want to move on, but it's not working at the mo.. I can't erase her memory so easily

KagamiD · Dec 16, 2008, 01:17 PM

I suggest you just keep yourself busy until it passes by. I don't think you know this girl well enough to know whether you want to go deeper. You may be infatuated with the idea with being with her and (since it seems you have been a bit obsessive before) you may be making the situation mean more than it actually is. My guess is that to her the special moment wasn't that special to her. Trying anymore is going to push her more away and only keeping yourself busy until your no longer thinking of her everyday will help (sorry if I have the wrong assumption). Once you get to that point try asking her to do simple things that don't require a relationship and see how close you get to each other (don't seem anxious).

ZoeMarie · Dec 16, 2008, 01:21 PM

If she told you she doesn't want anything, leave it at that. Otherwise you will end up pushing her away.

N0help4u · Dec 16, 2008, 01:35 PM

I agree Once you get to that point try asking her to do simple things that don't require a relationship and see how close you get to each other (don't seem anxious).
If a girl senses you are desperate, especially after she has been hurt, she will back off. Also when you come off as desperate then often girls interpret that as loser because they think you can't get anybody else so you end up over anxious.

SimpleguyJoe · Dec 17, 2008, 12:28 AM

Your in the position where she will set the pace. She has clearly told you she won't date you right now. How you handle that is going to decide if you ever get a shot. If you come off as being needy and wanting to be in a relationship every time your around her that's going to do nothing but turn her off from you even more. The fact that she distanced herself AFTER she kissed you should be enough to tell you that she is not intrested in the moment. But keep your chin up and try to be her friend if you want. (by friend I mean friend nothing else) and maybe when she is ready you will get a shot.

With that said why hold up your life over 1 girl? There are about 3 billion out there why put the only life you have on hold for her? I think you just need to get over it and keep yourself busy until this "cold" passes.