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    xxbabyblueeyes's Avatar
    xxbabyblueeyes Posts: 17, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Dec 14, 2008, 09:44 PM
    How do I act and get him get through this and determine his feelings?
    My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a year.were in college. Our relationship has had many downs and hardships but we always seemed to move past them. Recently, he's been going through a hard time at home with his dad leaving and divorcing the mom and basically not caring about the family whatsoever. The mom is also co dependent on him being a recently recovered alcoholic. My boyfriend is now telling me he doesn't see us going anywhere blah blah and just isn't showing much attention at all. But he then tells me he does love me and is sorry and is just taking it out on me but is worried what's going to come of us cause of our past.. idk what to do.. can someone please help me... I want him to be able to open up to me... hes so hurt from the past he doesn't show him feelings or emotions and its getting hard to handle and making me look extremely needy... I need a solution asap... thanku! :(
    TrueFaith's Avatar
    TrueFaith Posts: 1,202, Reputation: 313
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    #2

    Dec 14, 2008, 09:55 PM

    Stop being needy. Let him deal with his issues

    And just tell him that you are there to support and that's it

    Don't make him talk if he dows not want to.
    And yeah he probable is not going to show you much effection as he is going in a bad bad patch..


    So stop worring about the relationship. And if he still likes you..

    Just relax and take each day as it comes
    And back off him a bit
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
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    #3

    Dec 15, 2008, 06:29 AM

    Just give him time to deal with his family issues, they are going to take a toll on him and you can push him away. Just let him know that you are there for him if he needs anything
    kctiger's Avatar
    kctiger Posts: 3,653, Reputation: 1319
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    #4

    Dec 15, 2008, 07:09 AM

    Sorry you are dealing with this, but right now he has bigger fish to fry, and your issues of clinging to him will only drive him away. You need to be strong, not only for yourself, but for him. Do you honestly think that being upset at him not being totally into you right now will help the situation? Just be a good friend, that he needs, and be strong. It will be all right... just another bump in the road. Good luck!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #5

    Dec 15, 2008, 08:04 AM

    Ask Me Help Desk - Search Results

    You may think that his recent family problems are what's stopping this relationship from growing, but your history suggests that he is not as emotionally invested as you are, and it's a big red flag that he confides in another, and not you!

    Take this as a hint that this is falling apart. Protect yourself since the communication, and trust is breaking down, for whatever reason. Sorry.

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