Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    FindmyBirthMom3's Avatar
    FindmyBirthMom3 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
    		  
    #1

    Nov 19, 2008, 07:37 AM
    Need to findmy Birth mom NY
    I was born on February 24, 1983 in Newburgh, NY. My birth mother was 15. She made a wise and strong decision to give me a better life and place me up for adoption. Inow have a little girl and have somany questions. I truly want to find my birth mother and find out my background history. I want to know my medical history for the sake of myself and my daughter. I want to know where I came from and how much I have in common with her. I have had so many questions all throughout my life and Im ready for them to be answered. All the information above is all I know. Does anyone know how I can try and find out some information as free as possible? My life won't feel complete until I find something. I already went through the NYS Department of Health and got unidentifying information. I need something more. Please help! :)
    amberlin69's Avatar
    amberlin69 Posts: 8, Reputation: 2
    New Member
    		  
    #2

    Nov 19, 2008, 09:07 AM

    Go find out where you were adopted from. Then try and find the information of your mother, her name, address maybe. Once you have her name it won't be hard to find her.
    Synnen's Avatar
    Synnen Posts: 7,927, Reputation: 2443
    Expert
    		  
    #3

    Nov 19, 2008, 09:18 AM

    Actually, finding a birthparent is harder than you'd think.

    Your best bet if you need to go free is to post on adoption reunion boards, such as those at adoption.com, adoption.org and ISSR.

    The fact that you have non-identifying information says to me that your birthmother may not want to be found. Have you left letters for your birthmother at the courthouse in the county you were born? Or at the adoption agency used?

    With closed adoptions, unfortunately unless there is a serious medical situation the records will NOT be opened---getting them opened has to literally be a case of life and death. Unless you are willing to hire a PI or unless you are BOTH searching for each other, your odds of finding one another are slim.

    Are you able to get any information from your adoptive parents?
    J_9's Avatar
    J_9 Posts: 40,298, Reputation: 5646
    Expert
    		  
    #4

    Nov 19, 2008, 09:23 AM
    Let me also add to what Synnen said... Finding a birth parent is not always a walk in the park and can be hazardous to your mental health. My SIL found hers after years of searching and was struck hard with reality when she was bluntly told that the birth mother wanted nothing to do with her in the beginning and still doesn't.

    You have to tread very carefully when searching for birth parents.
    amberlin69's Avatar
    amberlin69 Posts: 8, Reputation: 2
    New Member
    		  
    #5

    Nov 19, 2008, 10:26 AM

    Oh I no its hard my best friend was adopted never found her parents. My other friend did. Im not saying its easy.
    happy2003's Avatar
    happy2003 Posts: 43, Reputation: 8
    Junior Member
    		  
    #6

    Nov 20, 2008, 02:23 PM

    adoption.com produced results for me.

    I randomly put info on there and 2 years later got a response. A DNA test was used to completely confirm, as the state I was adopted from wouldn't give me or my birth family any information.

    I do agree with everyone that says be careful... It's hard to deal with new people that have deeper feelings for you than you do them...
Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions
 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

My cat has given birth. Now what? [ 3 Answers ]

My cat has recently given birth to 5 beautiful kittens. I have heard that they are not allowed to be touched because she will disown them if she smells any one else's scent. She is still sleeping on the very towel she gave birth on and it stinks! How do I change her bedding without leaving my...

Birth Control causes birth defects? [ 1 Answers ]

So I take Ortho Tri Cyclen Lo and was reading some info about it and noticed that it said you should not take it if you are pregnant (obviously!) because it causes birth defects. So then I started wondering, what if you are taking it and for some reason it doesn't work and you end up pregnant (as...

Adding name to birth record and changing name years after birth. [ 3 Answers ]

I need to know how to add the fathers name to birth certificate years after child is born and changing child's last name.

Birth Name [ 3 Answers ]

Do I legally have to give my baby the father's last name if we are not married? NJ resident.

Can a minor birth mother's parents relinquish rights to the birth father? [ 5 Answers ]

Hello, Here's the situation: the soon-to-be birth mother is 16, still living with her parents and attending school. The birth father is 18, still lives with his parents but has a job and is generally responsible. The parents of the birth mother want her to put the baby up for adoption and move on...

View more questions Search