[wtfconfused]

My life up to now has been wonderful. I don't have many complaints about anything before. It could have been better, but it could have been worse. To this point I've been happy.

But the past few years have been different. Over this time I've noticed I've become more aggressive, less motivated, unsympathetic, and somewhat selfish. Not ridiculously selfish, just more then I have been. For me, these things are very strange.

It wasn't just a black and white change. Slowly I started changing. Sometimes I would notice and try to fix it, but eventually I would be back where I was, if not worse. I am normally an optimistic person, and still am, but I just don't know what is going on.

It has really been bothering me. I've been very stressed out. I don't like this change. It's not healthy for me. I just graduated from high school last year, so I wonder if I could just be having trouble coping with the realities of life. I hope that could be the answer. That would give me some hope.

The past few weeks I've been ridiculously down on myself. If one thing went wrong, my entire day was destroyed.

As long as I can remember I have never found a passion for anything. Sports, hobbies, girls, anything. Friends are the only thing that I found I was interested in a long term investment with. I wonder if that has anything to do with this feeling.

I would deeply appreciate some help on why I've been changing like this or anything that may help me progress forward.
Thank you

[mcrunner]

It could just be the lifestyle change. High school is a lot different from reality. Once you leave, you start to have a lot more responsibilities which can be overwhelming. It may take a while to adjust. Sometimes the stress from all these things can just make you very irritable. If this stress is continuous, it always seems to feel like your right on the edge of a cliff, and one small thing will push you over the edge.

My suggestion would be to find some way to relieve some of this stress. Find something you enjoy doing that makes you feel relaxed. Take an hour or so a day and devote it to this activity, or however long you feel necessary. Just taking a short break from all of the stresses of life can really make a big difference. Continuous stress just builds up, and you need to find a way to release it.

[Choux]

The details are very important in your situation... just generalilties are not too helpful other than you are suppressing anger at yourself for not making a positive life for yourself by developing your skills and having hobbies and sports with friends to go along with them.
That suppressed anger comes out in spurts, is my guess, along with making you somewhat depressed.

A successful life is about *being active/doing stuff*... finding your way and building a person with integrity.

[linnealand]

It sounds like you might really benefit from some sessions with a therapist.

At the very least, this could help you to get all of your thoughts and feelings out on the table. It could be that you're just having a tough time with the pressures of growing up. Growing up is tough! ;)

But it would be helpful to know if this therapist thinks that there might be more going on beneath the surface, such as depression or anxiety, etc..

You don't have to struggle with so much on your own. I hope things start picking up for you soon!