Heartbreaker, Heartbreaker

jrwild62 · Sep 3, 2008, 10:37 AM

Threads merged

Me and my girlfriend broke up 3 months ago after a year. After realizing that her needing time and space was a farce, I finally knew it was really over. She got a new guy in only 3 weeks after I was gone. 2 weeks after that via emails, she boosts how the new guy is so perfect, the future looks so great, and happily ever after. No dought this is rubbing it in, but is this typical behavior? It seems like not too long ago, we were perfect and happily ever after. Is this a tactic to hurt ex-mates?

BrewCrew0981 · Sep 3, 2008, 10:44 AM

She testing the waters, seeing how you will react to see if you still care or not. She wants a backup plan in case this guy falls through, which rebounds ALWAYS do.

akez · Sep 3, 2008, 10:54 AM

And not to mention every ex wants the other ex to think their much happier after a breakup.

Applejacks83irv · Sep 3, 2008, 10:55 AM

For get about it!! She trying to make it hard on you to move on? So she like old meat! She starting to smell real bad! But yeah?

wow111 · Sep 3, 2008, 01:42 PM

Maybe you did not fulfill her needs ever ask her??
Break ups happen all the time get over it. You problably did not fulfill her needs. Or you did something wrong. Rethink of the way the break up happened. My ex took me for granted and I kicked his to the curb. He finally got the drift...

Jess-the-mess · Sep 3, 2008, 04:14 PM

I agree with brewcrew.. she's just rubbing it in your face..
She doesn't sound that special if she's being like that so just try and move on..
Good luck! Xoxox

JBeaucaire · Sep 3, 2008, 04:53 PM

Wish her well, do not respond to specifics.

jrwild62 · Sep 3, 2008, 05:35 PM

Originally Posted by wow111

maybe you did not fullfill her needs ever ask her???
Break ups happen all the time get over it. You problably did not fullfill her needs. or you did something wrong. Rethink of the way the break up happened. My ex took me for granted and I kicked his to the curb. He finally got the drift...

Actually I did fulfill her needs. I paid my rent money on time. I am sure that she used me for that just like she said she used her ex-husband. She says, "I don't know why I married him, I think it was because of money". As soon as she became self sufficient, she threw him out on his butt. Why I didn't see this as a red light, I will never know. Blinded by lust, I suppose. As far as other needs, I filled them just fine. However, they were unappriciated. Now her new guy, will slowly but surely feel the pain of being used.

ylaira · Sep 3, 2008, 06:00 PM

Why you still talk to her anyway? Next time you accidentally cross paths, show off your glow without her and wish them well.

friend4u178 · Sep 3, 2008, 06:26 PM

Originally Posted by jrwild62

Actually I did fulfill her needs. I paid my rent money on time. I am sure that she used me for that just like she said she used her ex-husband. She says, "I don't know why I married him, I think it was because of money". As soon as she became self sufficiant, she threw him out on his butt. Why I didn't see this as a red light, I will never know. Blinded by lust, I suppose. As far as other needs, I filled them just fine. However, they were unappriciated. Now her new guy, will slowly but surely feel the pain of being used.

Sounds to me you were lucky to get out of this when you did , just ignore her and it will show you are a far better person than she deserves.

jrwild62 · Sep 3, 2008, 07:03 PM

Originally Posted by friend4u178

Sounds to me you were lucky to get out of this when you did , just ignore her and it will show you are a far better person than she deserves.

Yes, I was lucky to get out when I did. Between her and her bi-polar disorder, and that drug addicted kid of hers, things were ready to explode. I value my peace and quiet again.

friend4u178 · Sep 3, 2008, 07:15 PM

Originally Posted by jrwild62

Yes, I was lucky to get out when I did. Between her and her bi-polar disorder, and that drug addicted kid of hers, things were ready to explode. I value my peace and quiet again.

Good for you :)

Applejacks83irv · Sep 4, 2008, 07:14 AM

Its all good baby! She did you the favor!

wow111 · Sep 4, 2008, 11:30 AM

[QUOTE=jrwild62]Actually I did fulfill her needs. I paid my rent money on time. I am sure that she used me for that just like she said she used her ex-husband. She says, "I don't know why I married him, I think it was because of money". As soon as she became self sufficient, she threw him out on his butt. Why I didn't see this as a red light, I will never know. Blinded by lust, I suppose. As far as other needs, I filled them just fine. However, they were unappriciated. Now her new guy, will slowly but surely feel the pain of being used.[/QUOTE

Lust is you guys problem all alone... and how do you know you filled all her needs...

jrwild62 · Sep 4, 2008, 11:54 AM

[QUOTE=wow111]

Originally Posted by jrwild62

Actually I did fulfill her needs. I paid my rent money on time. I am sure that she used me for that just like she said she used her ex-husband. She says, "I don't know why I married him, I think it was because of money". As soon as she became self sufficiant, she threw him out on his butt. Why I didn't see this as a red light, I will never know. Blinded by lust, I suppose. As far as other needs, I filled them just fine. However, they were unappriciated. Now her new guy, will slowly but surely feel the pain of being used.[/QUOTE

Lust is you guys problem all alone...and how do you know you filled all her needs...

Lust was the wrong word. I really did love her. We loved each other, at least for awhile. As far as her needs, I really don't know. There-in was the problem. We never communicated about the problems we had. I attempted to,, but that was always met with, "Oh, forget it", or the ever popular, "nevermind!" I think with better communication skills, we could have worked on it. Knights in shining armor do not present themselves. The luster wears off after awhile, I don't care who you are! Then it takes work, understanding, sacrific, and more work. After the work is done, it is time to continue working at it, until death do you part. This was not some teenage break up. As few times in my life I have truly loved someone, I thought this was it. Appearently, she lost that feeling. Unannounced to me. My bitterness is gone, but she has a nitch in my heart forever.

JBeaucaire · Sep 4, 2008, 02:40 PM

Originally Posted by jrwild62

Lust was the wrong word. I really did love her...My bitterness is gone, but she has a [niche] in my heart forever.

Awesome, perfectly normal and correct. Well done. As I've posted before, getting over a previous love is completely unnecessary. It's a part of who you are.

Onward.

jrwild62 · Sep 4, 2008, 02:51 PM

Originally Posted by JBeaucaire

Awesome, perfectly normal and correct. Well done. As I've posted before, getting over a previous love is completely unnecessary. It's a part of who you are.

Onward.

AGAIN,, Words of experience and true wisdom.
This is the best site I have ever run into. Bar none.
It's clean, desent, and deserves respect times 10.
And I thank you.
If you came here for a simple question about your relationship, just look at the other categories. Need a car repair? How to fix your AC? What's wrong with my cat? ASK!!
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talaniman · Sep 4, 2008, 09:41 PM

If you stop looking at what she is doing, and doing your own thing for you, you won't have time to worry about her motives.

wow111 · Sep 5, 2008, 12:52 AM

Originally Posted by jrwild62

Yes, I was lucky to get out when I did. Between her and her bi-polar disorder, and that drug addicted kid of hers, things were ready to explode. I value my peace and quiet again.

You sure were lucky. I have heard Bi-polar is a messed up thing to have. Lot of times it gets labeled on people when people get mad and others. A drug addicted son that is not good. Sounds to me you were perfect in the relationship. Wonder if you have any faults. Man if not guess you're a perfect person here. On the other hand there are two sides to a break up. I am glad for you you value your peace and quiet enjoy it.

jrwild62 · Sep 5, 2008, 01:37 AM

Originally Posted by wow111

You sure were lucky. I have heard Bi-polar is a messed up thing to have. Lot of times it gets labled on people when people get mad and others. A drug addicted son that is not good. Sounds to me you were perfect in the relationship. Wonder if you have any faults. Man if not guess your a perfect person here. On the other hand there are two sides to a break up. I am glad for you you value your peace and quiet enjoy it.

It sounds like Ms. Wow111 is bitter about a break-up also. Or is just plain dosen't like men. I never said I was not without faults, by a long shot. That's just the point, everybody has faults. When two people join, their faults are joined also. That's were work and understanding come into play. Successful couples talk and work things out. Unsuccessful couples say stuff like "OH Nevermind." If there were such a thing as a perfect couple, I wouldn't want to be around them. It must be sickening and extremely boring.
The point is, if people don't accept one another for who they are, the relationship is doomed from the start.