Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    ANB428's Avatar
    ANB428 Posts: 450, Reputation: 42
    Full Member
     
    #1

    Aug 22, 2008, 07:01 AM
    You need to stop going out all the time. I have two jobs and I go to school full time and I don't live anywhere around my mother. I NEVER go out and I got pregnant at 18 and I am now 22. I go out maybe once every 5 months. So, you need to buckle down and stop going out, or move out of your mom's house and raise your kid. You life was over when you decided to have the baby. It is about the baby now, not about you. I know that it sucks but that is life.
    CobraGirl03's Avatar
    CobraGirl03 Posts: 14, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #2

    Aug 22, 2008, 07:22 AM
    I disagree with ANB428. Your life is not over just because you have a baby. As long as you are going out AFTER your baby goes to bed, then you are not neglecting your parenting duties. I do think that you have a resposibility to act in a respectable manor while you are out. You should not be getting drunk, and especially driving drunk, or sleeping around with random men you meet at bars. The way I think about it is that if you would be ashamed to tell your daughter how you acted when she is older, then you don't need to be doing it. But going out in itself is not a bad thing. However, as long as you live in her home and she is the one staying home with your baby while you are out, your mother does have a right to say what you do. Her house, her rules. Her threat to you should be that if you do not do what she wants, then you will have to find another place to live. Which may be what you want to do anyway by the sound of things.
    My brother signed custody of his daughter over to our mother when she was little and then she refused to give her back. And he lost in court because the courts told him that he had to prove why moving her was a benefit over where she was already living. They said that she already had a stable home and they needed a reason to up-root her. His daughter is now 12 and he still does not have custody. If you love your daughter, you either need to do what your mother wants or move out. Maybe you can sit down with her and come to an agreement that you will limit the number of times you go out, maybe once a week. She may feel as though you are taking advantage of her by leaving the baby with her every night. Just something to think about...
    N0help4u's Avatar
    N0help4u Posts: 19,823, Reputation: 2035
    Uber Member
     
    #3

    Aug 23, 2008, 08:19 AM
    It might help if this was with the original post. Which it doesn't seem to be

    I agree with Anb428 that your social life is over after you choose to have a baby unless you can get a RESPONSIBLE babysitter and you are not trying to act like you have no responsibilities or being irresponsible. Many single moms lives are over in that sense once they have a baby because many people will not watch a kid so the mother can go out living it up because they feel it is the mothers responsibility because she choose to have the baby.
    I have seen so many young moms have babies and then demand mom watches them so they can go out and have more babies (basically). So the mother ends up being responsible for the daughter AND the grand baby and then grandma is the one with NO life!

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

Unfit Mother? [ 3 Answers ]

After 25 years married, three children I finally (with the help of the women's shelter) found my freedom 9 years ago. One child is grown and married with his own family. Two daughters with me (joint custody... physical custody with me) they are now 15 and 25. The older one is moderately disabled....

Unfit mother? [ 3 Answers ]

I have a two year old son when my xhusband and I got divorced about a year ago and since then I have had to take on the role of being a single mother. I am a very devoted mother and my son is very well taken care of by myself. I have been recently been struggling with depression but am under the...

Unfit Mother [ 1 Answers ]

Can someone please tell me what constitutes an unfit mother?

Unfit mother? [ 11 Answers ]

My soon to be ex-wife has sent nude pics over the internet to other males, has stated that she wanted to run away with him, has put my 1 year old son in harms way by not having him in a car seat, and I have just learned that she is sleeping with her step-brother, who is living with her at her...

An Extremely Unfit Mother! [ 2 Answers ]

An Extremely Unfit Mother My brother is in the military. He is stationed in Hawaii. He came home to visit his family last Wednesday, April 16, 2008. He discovered that his door locks were changed on his house (the house is in his name only). He has an 8-year-old son with his wife. She has older...


View more questions Search