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Jane93 · Aug 7, 2008, 09:14 AM

Thank you to any who can offer advice. My daughter had a friend in college, good times. Nice graduation, etc. Now, a year later they have had a falling out and girl was uninvited to be a bridesmaid. She handled it by emailing and phoning my daughter for several months. She called my daughter's work to withdraw a reference, daughter had done work for her company. Daughter's work dismissed this woman. No contact since June when daughter and son-in-law (also receiving weird emails from the girl) sent emails telling her to STOP harassing them. Fast forward to this week, girl goes to court yesterday ex-parte claiming harassment and gets TRO. She emailed my daughter same day, three hours before the court appearance with the WRONG date. I check court calendar that afternoon and again this morning, YUP, girl went yesterday. No service to either daughter or son-in-law though both named in court. SIL has NEVER spoken to girl. Court calendar has August 27th hearing. Do they need to attend/respond/etc. if they are not served? Daughter has changed jobs, cell phone number and now email. SIL has new email and girl does not know where he works. They are hoping to move by end of August to avoid this woman. Thanks again for sticking with me though this description.:)

JudyKayTee · Aug 7, 2008, 10:05 AM

Originally Posted by Jane93

Thank you to any who can offer advice. My daughter had a friend in college, good times. Nice graduation, etc. Now, a year later they have had a falling out and girl was uninvited to be a bridesmaid. She handled it by emailing and phoning my daughter for several months. She called my daughter's work to withdraw a reference, daughter had done work for her company. Daughter's work dismissed this woman. No contact since June when daughter and son-in-law (also receiving weird emails from the girl) sent emails telling her to STOP harrassing them. Fast forward to this week, girl goes to court yesterday ex-parte claiming harrassment and gets TRO. She emailed my daughter same day, three hours before the court appearance with the WRONG date. I check court calendar that afternoon and again this morning, YUP, girl went yesterday. No service to either daughter or son-in-law though both named in court. SIL has NEVER spoken to girl. Court calendar has August 27th hearing. Do they need to attend/respond/etc. if they are not served? Daughter has changed jobs, cell phone number and now email. SIL has new email and girl does not know where he works. They are hoping to move by end of August to avoid this woman. Thanks again for sticking with me though this description.:)

It is NEVER a good idea not to appear in Court when you know there's a matter in which you are involved, properly served or not. It's a lot easier to defend at the time than attempt to reverse.

All of that aside, why is your daughter protesting the TRO? It will work in both ways and keep this woman out of their lives - unless your daughter appears and asks for joint orders, each restraining the other.

A lot will depend on what your daughter said in the emails asking this woman to stop - did she rise to a level of harassment through language, frequency, threats - ?

If the facts are as you say - and I have no reason to disbelieve you - and your daughter/son-in-law have no obnoxious or threatening contact with this person I would allow the TRO and have nothing more to do with her. If the friend decides that your daughter is in violation of the TRO and is NOT in violation then the friend gets charged with filing a false Police Report.

Win, win for your daughter from what I can tell.

Jane93 · Aug 7, 2008, 04:42 PM

Thank you Judy. I am new to this but hope you see this response. All would be happy with never seeing this "lady" again. Request to her to stop calling and emailing was a "nice" letter which concluded with "I am sorry to have considered you a friend." It also was just one email back to the woman. Problem lies with how a current and/or future employer might view an employee with a restraining order (right or not) against them. Thank you again. I guess we will head to a lawyer if/when or if not service is made.
Thanks again!

JudyKayTee · Aug 7, 2008, 05:03 PM

Originally Posted by Jane93

Thank you Judy. I am new to this but hope you see this reponse. All would be happy with never seeing this "lady" again. Request to her to stop calling and emailing was a "nice" letter which concluded with "I am sorry to have considered you a friend." It also was just one email back to the woman. Problem lies with how a current and/or future employer might view an employee with a restraining order (right or not) against them. Thank you again. I guess we will head to a lawyer if/when or if not service is made.
Thanks again!

I've never seen a restraining order on a background check UNLESS it's part of a plea deal so I wouldn't worry about it -

But never a problem being safe and getting advice from an Attorney.

cyndyleach · Mar 7, 2009, 01:20 AM

Is it legal for a court commissioner to issue a ex-parte t.r.o un-noticed order on a unsuspecting person, when the only reason given to obtain the order was the person asking for order stated wife had thrown a soda can at his head and he was afraid of her, order was granted without checking to see if there were prior reports or convictions of violence or police reports making claim of violence. Wife is innocent of wrong doing but is thrown out of home from false report of husband, How can a court justify allowing this to happen to a innocent woman, who finds out husband was having an affair and used tro to get rid of her with out paying or dividing assets?

JudyKayTee · Mar 7, 2009, 06:58 AM

Originally Posted by cyndyleach

Is it legal for a court commissioner to issue a ex-parte t.r.o un-noticed order on a unsuspecting person, when the only reason given to obtain the order was the person asking for order stated wife had thrown a soda can at his head and he was afraid of her, order was granted without checking to see if there were prior reports or convictions of violence or police reports making claim of violence. Wife is innocent of wrong doing but is thrown out of home from false report of husband, How can a court justify allowing this to happen to a innocent woman, who finds out husband was having an affair and used tro to get rid of her with out paying or dividing assets?

This should be on its own thread.

Apparently this is legal in your State because it happened to you. If you want "back" into the home, then you need to retain an Attorney and get the Order set aside.

In MY area throwing a soda can at someone's head, no matter what your reasoning, IS a physical assault.