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Cales · Jul 28, 2008, 09:56 AM

My ex has not seen nor spoke to my chilren in about 1 yr. I believe it would be best if he would relinquish all rights because my husband wants to adopt them. Has he abandoned them? My children are 3 and 19 months, their biological father has not seen them in nearly a year, we recently went to court to start the custody and support hearings and he asked if he could see them. I informed him that my kids don't know who he is. I got married 1 year ago and my husband has been the only father my kids know, they call him daddy and the last time their biological father came over they were in histerics because he wanted to take them and they didn't know who he was. My children's biological father and I were never married but his name is on their birth certificates. While in court he asked for a paternity test to prove that they were his. All I want is what is best for my children and having someone pop in and out of their lives whenever he wants is not what is best. What can I do and how do I go about doing it? Thank You.

JudyKayTee · Jul 28, 2008, 10:04 AM

Originally Posted by Cales

My ex has not seen nor spoke to my chilren in about 1 yr. I believe it would be best if he would relinquish all rights bc my husband wants to adopt them. Has he abandoned them? My children are 3 and 19 months, thier biological father has not seen them in nearly a year, we recently went to court to start the custody and support hearings and he asked if he could see them. I informed him that my kids dont know who he is. I got married 1 year ago and my husband has been the only father my kids know, they call him daddy and the last time thier biological father came over they were in histerics bc he wanted to take them and they didnt know who he was. My childrens biological father and I were never married but his name is on their birth certificates. While in court he asked for a paternity test to prove that they were his. All I want is what is best for my children and having someone pop in and out of their lives whenever he wants is not what is best. What can I do and how do I go about doing it? Thank You.

He is their father and you cannot remove his legal rights to visit and support them (which are not connected to each other) without his consent UNLESS he has pretty much left them on a street corner without supervision or is a danger to them.

If your children don't know him you would request supervised visitation.

I'm afraid taking him to court for support and custody may have opened up this whole can of worms but, on the other hand, he is supposed to be supporting his children.

stinawords · Jul 28, 2008, 10:20 AM

Have you received any support payment? Even a single penny in the last year? The best thing would be to request supervised visits with their father until they get to know him (judges usually order this for three to six months). If your husband wants to adopt you can ask their bio dad if he will relinquish his rights but you can't take them from him is up to him and a judge.

Fr_Chuck · Jul 28, 2008, 11:04 AM

I am sorry, but no, unless he is willing to sign over his rights to allow your new husband to adopt, it is not going to happen.

In fact if he wants visits, he will get it. You may limit him to supervised visits for the first couple months but he will get visits. The best you can do is get a proper child support