[snotbubble]

I am 21 years old and am going to college with my boyfriend (who would be my husband if we had money for a wedding.) I began majoring in fine art and then in art education for a reliable pay check. He has talked me into trying web design since the job outlook for art teachers isn't good and the pay maxes out at 50,000. And the only way I won't get a job with web design is if I don't want to and the least I'll get paid is around 40,000 (but the job won't be that thrilling in my opinion).


NOW... KIDS... we both can't wait to have them, we want two and we want to be able to live without any financial worries. With all the social security problems, falling economy, raising gas prices, it adds to that worry. We both grew up poor and live in a bad area (got shot at last week driving to his sister's) So we want to get as far away from that as possible, which in his mind is making tons of money. He's getting a masters in some kind of engineering and is supposed to start at 60,000 right out of graduation! More than likely he'll eventually make six figures. So I pictured being a stay at home mom until they were old enough to go to school, and when they did go to school my work hours, as a teacher would be the same as theirs, sounded perfect to me but not to him. He's worried I won't find an art teaching position, which is possible I guess.

He also thinks that when we graduate and have kids, if I stay at home for at least 5 years until the kid(s) go to school, by then I will be competing with freshly graduated art teachers as apposed to my 5 year old degree with no additional work experience (as if a diploma expires or something!) I can see that for web design because of how they constantly update all the programs I'll have to use... but for art?

SO... MY QUESTION... To any stay at home mom with a diploma in your back pocket... How does all this work? Do you have the kid, go on maternity leave, throw the baby at a babysitter while you get some work experience? Or can you stay at home with the kids for a few years and jump back into your career?

[ScottGem]

Just a note on using this site. Please do not post the same question in several places. Your other threads have been removed.

[smokedetector]

Even if you start trying right now, it can take a year or longer to conceive. After that, you have 9 months until you're due. All in all, I'd say you have time to get one year of experience. Start looking for a job teaching, and if you can't find one, look for teaching assistant or substitute positions. Subbing is always a good way to go because you get the experience and it's flexible, you can quit whenever you get too far along in your pregnancy if you need to.

[tolerance]

Note that it might take a year or shorter to get pregnant because it took me a month. So even if you was planing on getting pregnant now it could happen sooner than later.

I have a career and I understand what your boyfriend he saying. I waited until I got a job and for the benefits to kick in, especially maternity leave before getting pregnant. Its always good to have a back up plan and I manage well but due to help from family. My mother watched my daughter as a child and I'm glad because now a days you must be careful.

Your 21 and got time. Let him get his career started and you do the same. Your plan on getting married, than do it and live a little before kids. Once you've one your would manage and be able to offer the child a lot.

[Fr_Chuck]

Well first the wedding, about a 100 dollars for a marriage license or less and you have a nice home wedding or a court house wedding, if you wait to "have the money" it will almost never happen.

Next in the US, yes if you are a professional, it is hard to have a family, it can work, but when the kids are sick and day care won't keep them how stays home with them? When they are at school at 11am and the school calls, who goes to get them. When the school is closed for teachers meeting or summer where do kids go. I know people do these things but they need to be considered