[xxbabyblueeyes]

My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year but since we go to the same college it seems like a lot more. We have always had a lot of ups and downs but we always broke through them and it made our love stronger. Lately something has changed and he doesn't want to hear it anymore. I do nag him a lot and have a bit of a jealousy issue which I openly admit to but he just doesn't see that I'm past it.. He thinks that whenever we talk on the phone its going to lead to a fight when its not anymore.. I know time will tell but he just doesn't want to be bothered with it anymore since he has a lot of other things going on in his life.. I just want things to go back to normal but I'm not sure how to do this.. im giving him space but he seems to be enjoying it a lot. Hes on vacation right now, and he texts sometimes saying I love you so much have a good day but doesn't sound enthusiastic on the phone.. im not sure if I'm expecting more then I should be.. please help with my neediness I already pushed him away he says he just can't deal anymore but he still loves me because if he didn't want to be with me he would end it.. but I hate this phase he is suddenly going through! 2 weeks ago we were fine now all of a sudden he's a huge CRANK and making me go insane and needy trying to get back his attention. I don't know when to call any of that because I am afraid to make a mistake and set off a fight.. ugh I'm hopeless I know I have low self esteem but I never thought it would get involved in my relationship

[Romefalls19]

Self esteem is a strange thing, you have full control of it, but seem to have none. Just continue giving him his space, maybe see a counselor about your insecurities and self esteem issues. It's never a bad idea to ask for help from someone and may show your boyfriend that you do want to change. Let him text and call you, that will allow him to make the effort on his own and not make you seem needy.

[Chery]

Please don't take this the wrong way because I could be wrong and will be the first to admit it, but I'm only going by what you write and also the picture in your avatar, so here goes.

Self-esteem ---- your picture shows the opposite. You look like you think you are the cat's meow and expect everything to come to you very easily just based on your looks.

You have a jealousy problem?---- don't think that's it. Again, looks like you just want each available minute dedicated to you, even though he tried to study - that's what school is for, learning and working toward a better future, so if he does not spend all his time with you, you get upset.

On the phone--- I bet he's just tired of you having to have the last word and always being right no matter what you talk about, so he just does not want to hear it anymore because he might feel that you don't really care what he says or how he feels.

Going back to 'normal'--- don't think it ever was, and truthfully he might be just enjoying the breather and I'm sorry if that bothers you.

He might really love you--- but does not LIKE the way you act or the things you do and that can hurt a guy who cares and feels he hasn't got a chance getting through to you.

Maybe he does not want to break it off because he hopes that you will eventually grow up. AND.. when in any relationship... it's not singular, like in the way you wrote 'my relationship' instead of our relationship.

AGAIN, this is only my opinion and what I perceive from your picture and your words - it could make you mad or give you food for thought. Either way, I hope it helped you a little in seeing how a 'stranger' who does not really know you but already has an impression, sees you at present, so think of how those around you 'see' you and look in the mirror and let me know what you see.

Give him a chance to miss you during this vacation and try to figure out what you can do to make things easier for both of you when he comes back.

Good luck dear - hope everything works out. Please keep us posted.

[plonak]

Ok I think you should listen to Chery..

You have some issues here that need working on.. everyone and I mean everyone needs their alone time every now and then.. it's just how it is

You can't suffocate a person, because they will run straight for the door.. seems like he's on his way..

You need to be confident with yourself and I don't mean your looks, I mean who you really are.. you seem to have this need to get attention from your boyfriend..

You want to know something that I learned in life? The tighter you hold on to someone, the more you push them away.. you can't scratch and claw and people and force them to be with you..

Give him his space.. give him something to miss.. be that independent woman that you want and desire to be.. I know you do.. just don't be afraid anymore