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PrincessChu-chi1312 · Jul 4, 2008, 08:34 PM

:confused: I have bine seeing this guy for about 3 months,but we known each other for 7 years and he asked me to marry him.hes a sweet guy and he's very nice and I do love him,but I'm worried about this. What if it doesn't work out? How do I know I'm ready for this?What if we do get married and then we have a kid?Then what I want to say yes but I'm so scared of these few things please help me!:confused:

ChihuahuaMomma · Jul 4, 2008, 10:31 PM

I would suggest a longer courting/dating period. Especially since you are very young. Tell him you would love to marry him, and you think that's where the relationship is heading, but you want to get to know him better on an intimate level first.

JBeaucaire · Jul 5, 2008, 06:19 AM

Remember, getting married means you do things differently. You make decisions differently, you face problems differently. It's not like dating AT ALL.

Dating, you're "checking each other out" and deciding if things are "working out" or not. That's why you take all the time necessary to make an informed decision. Make sure you can live with this person and all their 'issues' if they were to never get better, and possibly worse. This isn't a "love" process/decision at all, it's a "smarts/compatibility" decision.

Married, you're saying "OK, now make it happen." You are in it for the long haul. By getting married you are promising ahead of time to NOT throw in the towel or walk away just because things get hard, even REALLY hard. The whole point of marriage is a covenenat to keep trying, keep working, stay and do the hard things to get through it all. This is an "unconditional love" process.

TOO MANY PEOPLE get married and keep their dating mindset, that things can just be ended if "things don't work out". If this is where you're mind is at with this guy, even after all the time you've been together (7 years and dating 3 months), then you're not ready to get married. It's that simple.

Once you get married, you're not giving up no matter what happens, no matter how things develop, you two can survive any situation you encounter. You can. But only with the right mindset.