[bamba1972]

I was together with partner for 2 years. I moved from Australia to Canada to be with them. The relationship has had a lot of ups and downs.

I returned to Australia to apply for perm residency in Canada. My partner has since told me that they can't BE IN A RELATIONSHIP ANYMORE. They are worn out, they need time to themselves and want space. We have a dog together and I can come back to Canada to visit them.

I wrote back saying, fine you win, I am walking away from this relationship. After a couple of days I get an email, I am missing you right now, can we talk when I get back? I do not respond. A day later I get another email, I got home from camping and me and the dog had a great time. I want to talk to you if you are willing? I didn't respond. I finally get a phone call from my partner to my surprise. I am ringing because I don't want to end things on a bad note. I am not ringing to get back with you, I can't be in a relationship right now. I love you but not in love with you. We can still be friends, I want you to call me and you can chat with the dog on cam etc...

I am pissed off. I started no contact and they broke it by calling me. I am so angry at myself and angry with my partner. How dare they say one min they miss me and love me and then to next I don't want to be in a relationship. They have issues that they need to deal with. They don't want to hurt me anymore and they need to think of themselves!

I feel like taking revenge on them right now and spilling my partners intimate secrets to their family.

I said to my partner no we cannot be friends, I will not allowing you to have your cake and eat it to. They said in a shocked voice, fine I won't contact you anymore! You will never hear from me.

I am confused and do not know what to do. I still love my partner/ex and I know they still love me. This happened last summer as well. Canadian are crazy when they come to summer. They feel like they need to drop everything and party like maniacs.

What should I do?

[Chery]

You need to take time to collect yourself and stop thinking of 'revenge'.

Since you told him that you didn't want him to have his cake and eat it too - and probably in anger, why are you now surprised that he will stop contact with you.

Have you made plans on your future with or without your dog or independent career? I think that would be something to work on to keep busy until you find out what you really want in life.

For me, it's hard to think of being so angry at someone to want to tell their 'secrets' and want revenge, and then profess love for that individual at the same time. Your ego is too hurt for you to think logical, so take a deep breath and be a little kinder to yourself too.

Good luck.

[NorthernNiceGuy]

HAHAHAHA, sorry to laugh, just as a Canadian that made me laugh. But hey maybe its true, my relationship just ended too... possibly something to do with canadian women??

But more seriously, you know what you have to do, you have to go no contact, you now have a firm answer that it is over and it is time to leave it alone. Don't go telling her family her secrets.. Read what you wrote... that's incredibly immature and will get you no where. You won't feel better by doing it no matter what you think right now.

A lot of ex's are selfish that way, they expect that even though they broke your heart you can still be their friend. You're right, she can't have her cake and eat it too, and you told her.. and she told you she won't call you anymore (hopefully she won't) So what is there left to do? Start moving on...

If this has happened before last summer than it will happen again if you do somehow get back together. You are are a continent and an ocean away, that should help a bit when it comes to nc.

[Chery]

HAHAHAHA, sorry to laugh, just as a Canadian that made me laugh. But hey maybe its true, my relationship just ended too... possibly something to do with canadian women????

You are are a continent and an ocean away, that should help a bit when it comes to nc.

Are you sure it's a 'she'?

With all this 'them' and 'they' crap (excuse me, but normally when 'we' get personal we know and at least state what sex the other individual is) it's hard to tell and I think it's either anger or childishness.

The OP needs to cool off.