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    jhayslip's Avatar
    jhayslip Posts: 5, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 16, 2008, 07:14 AM
    Arranging a custody agreement with a difficult parent
    I have found that the mother of my child is not easy to compromise with. I'd like to set up some type of custody agreement but as of yet am unable to do so because everything I bring up she seems to disagree with. She has made the comment that what she says goes. I'd like to petition the courts for some type of custody agreement... not full custody because I don't want to take him away from her. I just want something filed in the courts that states that when I have him he is with me and so she can't argue or take away my time with him.

    Any help on how I go about this would be greatly appreciated.
    ScottGem's Avatar
    ScottGem Posts: 64,966, Reputation: 6056
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    #2

    Jun 16, 2008, 07:17 AM
    So get a lawyer and file your petitions. You do NOT want to make any agreement directly with the mother. You WANT any custody/visitation to be backed by court order.
    cdad's Avatar
    cdad Posts: 12,700, Reputation: 1438
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    #3

    Jun 16, 2008, 01:23 PM
    I agree with Scot on this one. Yes its nice to come to an agreement but even if you can ( as some couples do and courts encourage ) you still need to have it ratified and affirmed by the courts. If she is being difficult and depending on where you live you might also ask for parenting classes so she ( and yourself ) can learn to transition as parents of your child/children. The important thing isn't anything to do with you both but with the children. If she is as difficult as you imply then try to remain focused on your goals as well as listening to hers. Also in the case of young children or babies it might be good to get a graduated plan going that way your not jumping back and forth into the courts. Maybe short periods now ( when a baby ) to extended periods later when child is older and better tolerates overnights.
    George_1950's Avatar
    George_1950 Posts: 3,099, Reputation: 236
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    #4

    Jun 16, 2008, 01:25 PM
    What state? Sometimes it is much easier to file the custody, visitation, and child support petition and let the judge handle it; this sounds like just such a case.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #5

    Jun 16, 2008, 01:27 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by jhayslip
    I have found that the mother of my child is not easy to compromise with. I'd like to set up some type of custody agreement but as of yet am unable to do so because everything I bring up she seems to disagree with. She has made the comment that what she says goes. I'd like to petition the courts for some type of custody agreement...not full custody because I don't want to take him away from her. I just want something filed in the courts that states that when I have him he is with me and so she can't argue or take away my time with him.

    Any help on how I go about this would be greatly appreciated.


    Is she being difficult because you are attempting at this point to change the child's last name to yours instead of hers?

    The two of you apparently agree on very little - you will have to take both issues to Family Court.

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