[confusedgf]

My boyfriend and I have just been together for almost 3 years and we've been living together for 6 months. We have had a lot of fun in our relationship but we have also argued about a few things of course. (stuff like his porno habit, addiction to warcraft, and that he always seems to put his friends first) I really care about him sooo much but it is getting so stressful because he always expects that I am going to at him. Sure, I have about certain things before but I love him and I want to get back to that place where we were so excited to see each other and stuff. We never go out together anymore and I am so sad about so many things. I don't know what to do. It's so hard to describe how I feel about the whole relationship but I need to talk to him and he is afraid to have relatioonship talks. I feel like he is more committed to our lease than he is to me. Please help. What can I do to make him more happy? Because I think if he is not expecting us to have an argument all the time, I will feel a lot better. I cry everyday and everything else in my life is going so good. Any advice would be greta. Thanks.

[450donn]

Sorry you moved in with him. As I see things from you post he has several addictions. Porn, games. Does he drink or do drugs too? What do you expect about going out. He is not dating you anymore. As far he is concerned you two are married without the license. So why should he spend any money on you? You might want to start a serious rethink of this relationship and where it is not going.
Friends first,
Then marriage,
Then sex

[JBeaucaire]

That you're living together makes this WAY harder than it really is. After 3 years of dating, I would expect any self-aware female to be considering the marriage life, and considering it HARD.

You know this guy now. The parts of your life you have control over seem to be working well for you. That's not an accident. In the rest of your life, you probably don't put up with pointless childish crap. Do you?

Well, why are you putting up with it in your most important relationship? And by "putting up with it" I'm not asking why you don't demand he change. I already know you're smarter than that. After 3 years, you know darn well he isn't changing.

In fact, he doesn't even really get it, does he? As far as he's concerned, you're making mountains out of molehills.

So, living with him keeps you from being nice to yourself and letting you slip gracefully away to the awesome guys out there with cool habits, loving characters, and ambitious goals. Some of them may have already thrown attention your way and you missed it, either accidentally or on purpose.

You can stay with your live-in boyfriend, but he will ALWAYS be the guy you know. That's the only thing you can say for certain... he is what he is.

Is what he is OK with you? Make a choice, then put your choice into action like you do for everything else in your life. This deserves the same strong "you" that you use for everything else.

You can do it.

[CFZD]

JBeaucaire said it all! I wish I could spread a greenie but the system doesn't allow.