[blaurence]

:( Help!! I caught my 9 y/o son on the internet looking up ** adult web site*** and that brought him into very inappropriate materials on the internet. I found this out because I allowed him to be on the computer with his friend for about 10 min. I was in the next room when they left the room they seemed suspicious so I checked it out. When I checked the computer it had been completely shut of which I thought was odd, because we leave it on sleep mode. When I looked under history of comp. it brought me to a few sights of porn so I immediately confronted both of them to tell them that it was wrong and to talk to them about it, they both confessed what they did I went and told his friends mom who lives next door and she was just as mortified as I was. I asked them where they would get the idea to even think to be looking at these things, my question is is this normal at this age and how do you explain the things he did see ( they were very graphic)??

[Fr_Chuck]

Yes it is normal to want to look, sadly the internet lets them see so much more than some of the playboy magiznes did 20 years ago.

What you need to do is get a content blocker for your computer, and perhaps your neighbors computer so they can not access it.

One of the top rated ones is
Bsafe Online #1 Family Filter

[Clough]

One thing that I would like to add that, if you can, it would probably be a good idea to have the computer in a part of your home that is used by everyone a lot so that whatever is on the screen can be in full-view of anyone in an instant.

As far as how to explain to him what he did see, sounds to me like the two of you need to have a pow-wow about the "birds and the bees" and what's normal and appropriate or not concerning sex.

[startover22]

I think the others are on the right track with their advice.
I keep our home puter in the play room, I alwys can see it and who is on it. We have the parental block up for the puter, and even you tube has a parental block! Use them, that is what they are there for. SO we got that figured out, but do you think he is ever going to forget the website address? Nope, and when he is at his friends house, what do you think he might do? You may want to address this with him and set some boundries... Know your kids friends, and their parents, call parents and make sure they know what he is allowed to do and not allowed to do. This is your job and theirs if they want their kids to have friends over. Tell him he needs to be trusted. (I sense that since HE KNEW ALREADY IT WAS WRONG, that is why he turned the puter off) There should be consequenses for this, not just a talk in my opinion. Good luck! :)

[MOWERMAN2468]

Umm, does parental controls strike a bell here? You can set up parental controls, blocking such garbage. Such as language, violence, and nudity. Check in your internet options and set up the levels appropriate for your home.

[excon]

so I immediately confronted both of them to tell them that it was wrong and to talk to them about it, they both confessed what they did I went and told his friends mom who lives next door and she was just as mortified as I was.

Hello mom:

We are sexual beings from the get go. You shouldn't be surprised (and certainly not mortified!) at your sons curiosity.

excon

[jpeters]

You can block the content, but you cannot take the desire and curiosity to see the content out of a young man's heart. We are hard-wired for sex. We live in a sexualized society that robs our children of their innocence at a very young age. For many men who struggle with pornography today, it began with a curious thrill of sneaking a look at my Dad's magazine collection. This material is criminally easy to access by children on the internet. We have a 12 year old, and we have gone through this with him as well. Today he has no internet access unless someone is in the room. We are considering sending him to counseling as I understand this to be an emotional issue once it becomes ingrained.

I suggest you read "Every Young Man's Battle" I think you will need to know that material for what is ahead for your son.

[excon]

We are considering sending him to counseling as I understand this to be an emotional issue once it becomes ingrained.

Hello j:

Emotional?? Ingrained?? I'm sorry, momma. There's nothing wrong with your kid. Looking at porn and whacking off is MAINSTREAM AMERICA. People who do it DON'T need counseling.. They need privacy.

excon

[jenniepepsi]

Got to spread the rep ex, but well said :)