[ffrazer]

I have accepted the fact that I am a compulsive lier. My relationship is not going well due to the lies I tell. A lot of times I have no reason to lie but yet still I do. This is something I need help with, and I would like some feedback as to how I can stop these lies and start telling the truth. It is said that relationships are based on trust, my girl does not trust me and its eating me alive. What can I do to regain her trust. I Want nothing more than to be a change person that someone can trust.

[Alty]

I suggest you go to therapy, find out why you are lying all the time. If you choose not to do that then there's really no other advice I can give you. You have to make a conscious decision not to lie anymore, it's up to you, no one else can change your behavior.

[meseret10]

My boyfriend is exactly like you. Why do you think you lie? I couldn't even tell you how much it hurts to be lied to by somebody that you love. Anything that you could tell her would be better than a lie. My advise? You don't need therapy, just stop lying and with time she'll trust you again.

[Zell]

A lot of people lie in a relationship because they are insecure, they think/feel the thruth isn't good enough so they make up stuff to make them look better, even though there's probably nothing wrong with the reality.
What kind of stuff do you lie about? Things you've done in the past or stuff like where you was last night?

[meseret10]

If he know his problem he should stop lying. The same than a cheater or somebody that's trying to stop smoking. Once you acknowledge your problem, you fix it. Therapists are for weak people.

[kp2171]

Honest truth is you might need to talk to someone who can really help... talk to a counselor.

Yeah... it sucks to hear that. I've been there myself. I'm a guy who thinks he can tough anything out... fix it myself... as much as I like helping others, I'm the last person to ask for help.

All that said... I went to a counselor a few years back. Hated making the appointment. Crushed me. Hated it.

But if felt better walking out. Felt like id started a new day.

And I'm just not a touchy-feely guy. I didn't want to go there. But it helped.

You might consider this. All professional help does is help you do what you are already capable of.

And your issue is real. Don't do it for her... do it for yourself.

If you don't... this will likely be a means of destoying every relationship you have. Most people can deal with reality one way or another... but lies absolutely break the foundation on which most realationships are built.

So... time to do something about it. Sooner is better than later.