Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
    simoneaugie's Avatar
    simoneaugie Posts: 2,490, Reputation: 438
    Ultra Member

    Apr 23, 2008, 07:17 PM
    Some people just process things that way. It's probably a combination of nature and nurture in their upbringing. My husband is like that. We've gotten past it by talking about it.

    I told him that when he "leaves" I feel abandoned. He told me that sometimes, his emotions are so overwhelming and he has to think about it for a few days. Now, even if it's me that he's mad at, he is good about telling me. "I'm really mad, I'm going to my cave, but I'll be back!" Then it's time to let it be his stuff.

    At that point, it's a good idea to talk to my girlfriends (not about his anger) and find other things to do. Men really are like rubber bands. (Men are from Mars... )
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855

    Apr 24, 2008, 07:22 AM
    Your right he has issues he needs to deal with, and until he does, you won't have a clue as to how to deal with him.
    confoundedj's Avatar
    confoundedj Posts: 11, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Apr 30, 2008, 10:55 PM
    is there any way out? Bf's name stuck on a mortgage for the sake of his family
    This is a complicated situation of which I do not know all the details.

    My 33yr old boyfriend bought his parents' house 3 years ago. His father's company went bankrupt and the bank repo'd the house. His family did not know what to do, his father was undergoing a severe depression, so his brother decided to try to buy the house but his credit was not good enough. My BF ended up having credit god enough to take out a mortgage to buy the house so his parents could continue to live there. He moved back home.

    I do not know what the exact agreement was, but I think his mother, father and youngest brother that was still living at home, were supposed to pay most/maybe all of the monthly mortgage as well as the property taxes. Lately, his family has not been coming up with enough money to cover the payments and didn't contribute anything towards the property taxes. Since my BF's name is on the mortgage, he always has to come up with the money. The stress of dealing with this is ruining his life, his finances, his relationship with his family, and is hard for me to understand. What sort of a family would ask this of their child? Are they not aware of how this is ruining him?

    I'm trying to see a way of this for him, but there is no good solution. He cannot think of turning his family out, and even if he sells the house he is at a financial loss. His parents argue that the high utility bills prevent them from coming up with the money. His youngest brother (25?) hasn't had a job for months.

    I do not know what kind of conversations he has with his family, although I understand that contact has been minimal lately.

    Is there any way out? If these were random renters they would have been evicted, but it is his family, he could never do that to them.

    Anyone have any advice??
    lostinlove1221's Avatar
    lostinlove1221 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member

    Feb 8, 2010, 08:03 PM
    Well my boyfriend and I said it within a month of knowing each other and two weeks of actually dating. I admit we are still in the beginning of the relationship but we both know what we are feeling is love and that will never change (negatively). I also think that the reason some people take a long time to say I love you is a) they've been hurt before and don't want to get hurt again or b) they're scared the other person may not feel the same or feel like its too early or c) they want to make sure of what they're feeling (like its not the honeymoon phase)
    So you I don't think there is ever a perfect time for all relationships to say it like it just depends on the couple and how they feel about each other
    Let me just add if its real love you know it , there is absolutely no confusion about it :) <3

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions


Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Check out some similar questions!

Eviction timeline II [ 3 Answers ]

DUE TO FORECLOSEURE Is there any way to get a judge to allow me time to pick up and move? I figured I had at least a month to move and was trying up to the last minute to get the money to stop the foreclosure so I haven't even started packing. EDIT: I have been told I have 5 days by the buyer,...

Eviction timeline [ 2 Answers ]

My home was sold at auction yesterday. Today I came home from work to find a note from the new owner that I must be out by Monday. I thought I would have 30 days to get my things and myself out. In in VA if that makes any difference.

Canadian Immigration Timeline [ 2 Answers ]

HI. I am an American citizen living LEGALLY in Canada. I can legally stay here with my kids and common law wife as long as I go to the border every 6 months and get stamped. My question is this, I am finally getting ready to start my immigration procedures and I was looking for a general time line...

Refinishing floors-timeline [ 2 Answers ]

We just bought an apartment that is a converted office building which was re-done about 4 years ago. The floors are hardwood and I think they look pretty good but my boyfriend really wants to sand/refinish them. We are also renovating our small kitchen which also has wood floors. My question is:...

View more questions Search