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zephirus-persia · Apr 3, 2008, 07:21 PM

Hi
Well, I am from Iran, 36 and the girl is 35, both never married. I asked her for marriage and she accepted wholeheartedly. After two months, she told me she had not a slightest tempting to sex me. We cut for two months and started again. My financial status catapulted within this time. She was far better than before until the other day quite suddenly she rejected all my calls and SMSes. She sent me some messages telling that she has the same feeling and can not do it, not as a husband, nor a friend. But she has the willingness to marry me. And she needed to see a family consultant.
She sent me another message last night, telling that she had met a consultant, and he/she has told her that she is in a state mentally and physicall that she can not get married for six months.
My question goes here: Does a family consultant can tell this? Is it up to them to tell if people are fit physically/mentally for marriage? Or she is lying me?
Thank you.
P.S. I love this girl really very much. Would do anything for her.

oneguyinohio · Apr 3, 2008, 07:47 PM

She may have been advised to wait that amount of time to sort out her feelings about the relationship, and not to get married until she has taken that time. There is no guarantee either way about what will happen after six months. I doubt that she is lying to you, but the consultant could make an assessment based on her statements that she is not feeling ready to get married at this time. The consultant might then have suggested the waiting period.

simoneaugie · Apr 3, 2008, 11:01 PM

I doubt that she is lying. It sounds as if she were very frightened.

Let her come to you, for both marriage and sex. If you really love her, you can wait 6 months. Her actions could be a sign that she feels that marriage will take away her freedom and that she has few choices.

Give her that freedom, and let the choice be hers. That is love. I don't know much about the customs in Iran. But, if she is not free to love you back and to choose you, then getting married might be a case of you owning her. Becoming the property of another is like becoming a slave. That is not love.