[lostcause7]

Hey guys. Well recently my girlfriend wanted a break. I don't know what to do. I told her to be happy and I respect the fact she wants a break. I was heart broken. She said she was tired of trying because she has school and etc. She missed a week of school, so she has so much to make up. I asked if she loves me she said I don't know any more. I was shredded into dirt. I was hurt. It was school the next day and I was very depressed I was breaking down. I am a soft kind of person I care about this girl so much. She meant so much to me. She was my first and I was her first. The hard part is that we had sex. That is so hard because you shared one of the best moments in a relationship. It very hard to siting next to her in class. On that day she was happy and talking to me. I couldn't respond, I would respond but in a low pitched depressed voice. I was upset and she is just playing it cool like it never happened. I was breaking down in class. The worst. I really don't know what to do. I talked to her and she said don't be so upset and depressed. Put on a smile. Just hide it in, I still care about you. I still cared about her. She gave me a hug then went to her class. She was right I shouldn't be depressed. I should be but not showing it. I am still depressed. So I decided to give her time. I didn't call her or text her. But she texted me one day and called. She said it was so hard for not to call or text. She caved in. it was yesterday. She said she will try not to call and text just for this weekend. She said she won her lacrosse game I was proud of her. Then she said this break will be over soon :). I said to take her time and go on your own pace. She said stay strong. I couldn't but I said I would. I said get better I care about you. She said you shouldn't care too much night. I knew she didn't mean it I just knew. I said don't say that. You were a big part of me. I loved you and I still do there's nothing you can to do to stop it. You made me happy for a long time. We had fun and bad times. I miss you and I have a right to care about you. I won't forget. I just can't. You made my days easier. I laugh and I was happy. That's the greatest achievement you can give in a persons life you gave that to me. After that I haven't heard form her. I don't know what to do. I really can't move on its very hard. Especially this is the first time. What should I do?

[talaniman]

She said she will try not to call and text just for this weekend.

If you can't make it through the weekend without your female, you are in a heap of trouble. So do something else and enjoy yourself, and let us know what Monday brings.

[nickshehe]

I think until you're certain you're going to marry a girl you should do your utmost do be dependent on yourself. Even though our heart aches and we can't sleep or eat or be productive in any sense of the word at times like these; it's all in our heads. You won't die without her, realizing that is a good step to becoming your own man. I'm a very emotional person, I haven't met any one else who is anywhere near as emotional as I am, both female/male. Women are my weakness in every sense of the word, I get trapped into trusting them too easily and I usually fold. But sometimes I just look at myself in the mirror and I tell myself to grow some testicles. It's good to be in touch with your emotions like you are, but you can't let them rip you apart in this way.
Whenever I'm feeling depressed I just play video games until one of my friends is free to do something then I go out and have a drink. The most attractive thing in a guy is if he has his own life - I found that out the hard way after I sacrificed everything for a girl who just gave up on me.
Pick yourself up man

[talaniman]

The most attractive thing in a guy is if he has his own life

Had to spread the rep, but you nailed this one!

[lostcause7]

Hey guys. Well recently my girlfriend wanted a break. I don't know what to do. I told her to be happy and i respect the fact she wants a break. I was heart broken. She said she was tired of trying because she has school and ect. She missed a week of school, so she has so much to make up. I asked if she loves me she said i don't know any more. I was shredded into dirt. I was hurt. It was school the next day and i was very depressed i was breaking down. I am a soft kind of person i care about this girl so much. She meant so much to me. She was my first and I was her first. The hard part is that we had sex. That is so hard because you shared one of the best moments in a relationship. It very hard to siting next to her in class. On that day she was happy and talking to me. I couldn't respond, i would respond but in a low pitched depressed voice. I was upset and she is just playing it cool like it never happened. I was breaking down in class. The worst. I really don't know what to do. I talked to her and she said don't be so upset and depressed. Put on a smile. Just hide it in, i still care about you. I still cared about her. She gave me a hug then went to her class. She was right i shouldn't be depressed. I should be but not showing it. I am still depressed. so i decided to give her time. I didn't call her or text her. But she texted me one day and called. She said it was so hard for not to call or text. She caved in. it was yesterday. She said she will try not to call and text just for this weekend. She said she won her lacrosse game i was proud of her. Then she said this break will be over soon :). I said to take her time and go on your own pace. She said stay strong. I couldn't but i said i would. I said get better i care about you. She said you shouldn't care too much night. I knew she didn't mean it i just knew. I said don't say that. you were a big part of me. I loved you and i still do theres nothing you can to do to stop it. you made me happy for a long time. we had fun and bad times. I miss you and i have a right to care about you. i wont forget. i just can't. you made my days easier. i laugh and i was happy. Thats the greatest achievement you can give in a persons life you gave that to me. After that i haven't heard form her. I don't know what to do. I really can't move on its very hard. especially this is the first time. What should i do?

Okay today I tried to take my mind off her. I went to the mall with my sis. Went shopping. I wasn't stable. I couldn't stable my emotions. So many things reminded me of her, I crashed. I caved in. Later on I breakdown just so depressed. I hate to see her go. So I caved in and texted her saying it was so hard. And I was sorry. So many things reminded me of you I can't pick myself up. Then I decided to just leave her alone. It would make things worse if I texted her or called her. I wish she comes back. She made me so happy, I can't let her go. Its stupid but I can't let her go. But I am going to leave her alone. I have changed I said sorry to every person I knew because I was such an @ss to people. I was guilty and was wondering why do I deserve this. I said sorry to my sister, to my friends, parents, teachers. I am going to be who I was and that god made me to be. We are blind what we do, what we say and we can do to hurt another. I said horrible things. I regret them. I done damage to other people. I said sorry. I was bullied for a long time. Now I am changing. This is my phase. I love her still and forever no matter what I promised her. I kept it still. Well I will see what will happen on Monday. I have my hopes high but I know I shouldn't. I wishes she comes back. She sits next to me in class its hard, but I have to suck it up and just deal what's coming down the road, what ever god has planned for me.
Should I give her a letter how I feel? I wrote one already should I give it to her on Monday? Its 3 pages long. How I felt and what has happened.

[talaniman]

Naw, just wait and see what happens and take one day at a time. Basically you do nothing until the emotional dust settles and you have a better handle on your feelings. Doing things under the stress, and duress your under may not be best right now, so don't be impulsive. Have you clicked on the links in my signature? Do so, and ready them all, they may help.

[nickshehe]

After I got quite cruelly dumped I also went through a roller coaster of emotion. I was angry at her, miserable, self-loathing,I started to blame myself for what happened e.t.c e.t.c
The truth of the matter is, somewhere in our relationship I did make mistakes, but it takes two to tango. We both messed up our relationship, and lately I had pushed her over the line so much that she's convinced that she has no feelings for me any more and there was/is nothing I can do about it. What you could do is learn from it though. If you broke up recently then there is no way you are convincing her that 3-4 days apart have made you a different man. Even though you may think that it has (much like I thought so too), and how everything will be different this time around - the chances are it won't be.
Yes, you don't know what you have till it's gone, but like I said it takes two to tango. She probably fueled an argument or two and I'm sure she has her flaws as we all do. The best thing you can do is pick yourself up and stop waiting for something to happen.
I went through exactly the same thing, I'll wait until I come back from amsterdam, she'll miss me and she'll call - she didn't. I collapsed within myself and called her - no one has ever been as cruel to me.
Then I'd tell myself - ill just wait till I go back to England.. (I haven't gone back yet but I'm definitely not waiting for something to happen). Neither should you. You have to stop being so dependent on a person. You won't die without her - trust me.

Concerning your letter, I also went through the same phase 4-5 days after my return from Amsterdam. I started writing a letter, I would read it to myself every day and take things out that I regretted and wrote new things that I felt. It's important that you think through what you're sending because when a person is emotional we're bound to be desperate and say things that we might not necessarily mean. The first time I wrote the letter I must've written sorry over 40 times.
After thinking things through I knew it was also her fault. I'm not going to lie to myself to get her back. You should always be true to yourself.. So if you feel the need to write a letter, my advice is to make it a work in progress.
Now whether you send it, it's your choice. Some people are against that..
I knew that the longer I waited for things to calm then the more "effect" the letter would have.. but then I also knew that if I had a letter in my possession that I'm dying to send it would be like I was still waiting for her..
I sent it after a week, stating it wasn't a plea for her to return or anything like that, it was just things I needed to get off my chest. She contacted me 4 days later and gave me the closure I needed. Now I know there's nothing there for me and I have to move on.

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I realise I'm getting into my break up a lot but It's so you know that you're not alone..
If you really want to send the letter, send it, but expect nothing in return.
Stop waiting for her - it will ruin you.