[katali81]

Hi, I am married man of 36yrs with wife 34yrs and kid 9yrs. I love my wife and kid.

But I have my girlfriend (GF) of 27 too. I have not touched my girlfriend till now as she is virgin and is ready to be my second wife and ready to accept my wife as her sister and agrees to live in the family and do everything to prosper our family, but my wife is not obviously ready to accept her. They both give me very good suggestions about my business to support me and to bring up my business. GF even reminds me about my wife's medical care and other functions which I should attend with my wife. In my eyes both are wonderful person and I believe I can not hurt any of them. May be I am wrong..
Shall I keep my girlfriend separate from my wife and still keep her, if my wife doesn’t agree. I am sure I can take care of her even financially.

I know I will be getting many negative answers, but I want to listen if anybody had this kind of experience earlier and what would be the suggestions?

[HistorianChick]

Ok, wow...

One question... what is your child going to think of this??

I normally don't like answering these types of questions, but wow... this one has me puzzled.

Are you really asking if your GF should move in with your family? Surely not. I must have read this wrong...

You wouldn't put your child in this situation, would you?? Please tell me I'm wrong...

Are we talking divorce or polygamy, here?

[mogoverthemoon]

How did u manage to pull this off! And your wife's knows and is OK with it!
But stick with your wife if you have to make a decision on the two of them, you did promise to be with her for the rest of your life.

[starfirefly]

What you need to realize is a married man should NOT have a girlfriend!!

[bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE]

I have had no experience with such an issue but I can already feel myself boiling up...

I will keep cool.

Do you know why divorce rates are so high? I wonder...

When you get married, you devote yourself completely to this woman. Not your neighbor. Not the cute waitress. Not your best friend's hot sister.

You should really think before getting married. To answer your question, yes, tend to your wife. Love her. Make her feel special. Lose the girlfreind. You will meet so many good women in this world. That doesn't mean to go chasin' every single one of them.

I'm sorry I may come off as harsh but I don't agree with disloyalty, lying, unfaithness...

I hope you make the choice that will be best for you, your kid and your wife. Good luck!

[katali81]

Ok, wow...

One question... what is your child going to think of this???

I normally don't like answering these types of questions, but wow... this one has me puzzled.

Are you really asking if your GF should move in with your family?? Surely not. I must have read this wrong....

You wouldn't put your child in this situation, would you??? Please tell me I'm wrong....

Are we talking divorce or polygamy, here?

Hi again,
Yes That was my first intention to bring her in family, but as I said my wife does not agree.
About my son.. yes he knows her very well and they (gf and son) spend time together, playing.. watching movie.. etc.
We are not talking here divorce at all... Polygamy?? Maybe yes but not under one roof.

[HistorianChick]

Wow... I have no words. I'm a writer and I really don't know what to say.

I've typed and deleted then retyped and deleted... wow...

I would be very surprised if your wife agreed to this, no self-respecting woman would stay with a man that moved his lover into her house and expected her to eat meals with her, do her laundry, watch her son play with her... wow... Divorce sometimes is a necessary decision in which families re-adjust to different types of familial relationships, but polygamy (having more than one wife/husband) is socially, morally, and emotionally unacceptable in most cultures.

The example you're setting for your son is that this is OK... is this something that you would recommend your son to do in 20 years? Would you be OK seeing your son treat your future daughter-in-law the way you're treating his mother?

Always remember, what is allowed in moderation in parents is practiced in excess in the children.

I've decided to take that angle - the simple fact that you're setting a horrible example for your son... because for me, that is enough.

[katali81]

Wow.... I have no words. I'm a writer and I really don't know what to say.

I've typed and deleted then retyped and deleted..... wow....

I would be very surprised if your wife agreed to this, no self-respecting woman would stay with a man that moved his lover into her house and expected her to eat meals with her, do her laundry, watch her son play with her.... wow... Divorce sometimes is a necessary decision in which families re-adjust to different types of familial relationships, but polygamy (having more than one wife/husband) is socially, morally, and emotionally unacceptable in most cultures.

The example you're setting for your son is that this is ok.... is this something that you would recommend your son to do in 20 years? Would you be ok seeing your son treat your future daughter-in-law the way you're treating his mother??

Always remember, what is allowed in moderation in parents is practiced in excess in the children.

I've decided to take that angle - the simple fact that you're setting a horrible example for your son... because for me, that is enough.

I think you are right.. thanks for your suggestions.
I have spend 12 years with my wife and there is no way I would leave my family for anyone in this world. My mind might need more time to digest the whole thing, but I will get the right path.

[s_cianci]

A polygamous situation as you're describing is unacceptable in Western cultures. If you are of a culture that still practices this sort of thing then I really can't advise you since such a concept is so foreign to my own culture and what I deem acceptable.

[bEaUtIfUlbRuNeTtE]

You're wife doesn't accept this but she knows that you are seeing this other woman?

[talaniman]

Its obvious you don't live in Texas, as wives tend to skin g/f's alive, but just where are you, and does your culture allow this? Just curious.

[dudubrown]

I suggest if you love your wife and child don't break up a happy home it'll turn into a worthless house , stay humble