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    Just_a_wonderer's Avatar
    Just_a_wonderer Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Feb 7, 2008, 01:35 AM
    Friend can't get over her ex
    My best friend is still in love with her ex. They were together for almost 2 years and broke up about 4 months ago... he broke up with her. One of the known reasons was that she took him for granted.


    So she texts me stuff like this...

    "im feeling really sad and no one cares"
    "Im depressed about {ex boyfriend}"
    "he doesnt care about me anymore"
    "i still love him and want him to love me back. i dont get why im not good enough"
    "everyone keeps saying I need to let go, but how do i make myself not love him? how do I make myself not want him back?"

    She does love him and knows she needs to let go... how do I help her let go? I never have the right things to say to her when she wants an answer and I really want to help her move on... please help me!
    imation's Avatar
    imation Posts: 284, Reputation: 36
    Full Member
     
    #2

    Feb 7, 2008, 03:37 AM
    Just talk to her and be supportive
    She'll move on eventually, be a shoulder for her, she'll sppreciate some closeness
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #3

    Feb 7, 2008, 08:15 AM
    You can't help, only support her. Make some copies to the links in my signature, so you can give her some insights into her situation.
    Romefalls19's Avatar
    Romefalls19 Posts: 4,739, Reputation: 1130
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Feb 7, 2008, 08:32 AM
    The only thing she really needs right now is a good friend. I know from experience, after a break up you feel all alone and think everyone has turned their backs due to your love turning their back on you. Like the 2 previous have said, just be there for her. Text or call her out of the blue ask her house she is doing... Get her out of the house and keep her mind at ease.
    jiltedgirl's Avatar
    jiltedgirl Posts: 125, Reputation: 23
    Junior Member
     
    #5

    Feb 7, 2008, 10:41 AM
    The best you can do is be there for her. Comfort her. Don't judge her. Be honest, but kind. Let her get everything off her chest. Get her out of the house and socialize more with her friends.

    All you can do is be there for her. In time, she'll move on. :)
    HistorianChick's Avatar
    HistorianChick Posts: 2,556, Reputation: 825
    Ultra Member
     
    #6

    Feb 7, 2008, 11:24 AM
    You're being a great friend. Keep doing what you're doing - keep being there for her.

    When she's down, bring her cookies and a movie. Granted, Hollywood and chocolate doesn't solve everything, but if it's a classic movie and the chocolate is Godiva, it can do some pretty amazing things!

    I agree with tal... make copies of some of the posts on here - especially the ones in his signature - they are prolific... There are some amazing posts and threads on this site. Posts of people going through the same kind of things that she is... Consider telling her about it - she may be greatly helped by the advice from strangers.

    For example:
    https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ys-173215.html

    Above all, be there for her. Every person who goes through a difficult break up needs someone to cry to, vent to, and share with. You're being an awesome, wonderful friend.
    bieberhunny98's Avatar
    bieberhunny98 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #7

    Jun 18, 2011, 12:55 PM
    Sorry I know this is a late answer but here:
    Just be there to support her but if you want more then that, help her go through her things, and take out everything that reminds her of her ex. Tell her to put it all in a box, and hide it. But don't throw it away/cut it up/ or burn it because you regret doing that all later, and tell her that he is missing out on the best thing ever, but don't lie to her, that will hurt her even more. Tell her that that relationship was just practice because she is going to end up with a really nice man/boy/partner one day, and he is going to love her for her and no one else. He is not going to break up with her and break her heart because he will love her. Tell her all the things that you hear in movies, but not the ones where they lie, I can't TELL YOU HOW BAD LYING IS! Anyway, tell her that she deserves better then him, and she will be very happy with another man one day :)

    Sorry if that wasn't helpful. :)

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