[NYMARIPOSA]

I'm dating this guy that moved to California 6 months ago he was offered a job over there anyway two weeks ago he asked me to move out their then things started complicating with his job he may not have one at the end of the summer season so then a lot of things started to change with us and I feel that he has someone else but when I ask I'm told no and that he loves me very much. Well we hardly speak and when we do its late at night. He also told me that the emotions for me are their but not really the physical which I don't understand when he is here in NY we get together. Sometimes I feel like leaving him and moving on with my life but there are times that I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt and see what happens from their

What should I do?

[onlinecounsellor_Dale]

Hi
I am not sure what makes you think that the guy you are seeing has someone else, but I do understand that you are unsure about where you stand with him. Such uncertainty must be difficult to manage, especially when your relationship is long distance.

Quite clearly the relationship as it currently stands is not meeting your needs. I think you owe it to yourself to spend some time becoming clearer on how it is YOU feel and what YOU want, rather than continuing to focus on what may or not be going on with him. Do you want a future with this man? What may a future without him look like? Or, if you do stay together, how would you like your relationship to be different?

Good luck answering the above questions and I hope you find the answers you want!
Kind regards
Dale

[HistorianChick]

You need to decide if you are committed to pursuing a long distance relationship with this guy. If so, you trust him.

If not, then yes, you tell him you're not ready for a long distance relationship and you move on.

Either way, you make the decision and stick with it. He deserves that... and so do you!

[chrissy32290]

Well that's what sucks about long distance relationship you just never know.. and it doesn't sound like your happy being with him if your thinking about dumping him then do it because if you have any doubts about the relationship then I don't think its going to work out... you should meet up with him one more time and see how it goes and when you see him and if you get all butterflies in your stomach because your happy you haven't seen him in a while I would stay with him... but if you see him and its like no big deal and you don't feel a connection dump him