[Braden23]

I know this girl who broke up with her boyfriend because she wasn't happy with him. He never touched her, there was no passion, and he didn't treat her like she was his girlfriend. Not that he was bad to her, but he just wasn't very warm. She broke up with him and he immediately began trying to get her back; he was sweet, he took her to a bed and breakfast for her birthday, he went out of his way to visit her (they live an hour and a half apart), etc. Essentially, he reacted to losing her by trying to do all of the things that she wanted him to do all along. She is considering getting back together with him, but right now they are taking a break. More than likely, they will get back together. My question is, if they do, is it likely to work out? Can you rekindle something that has died out? And is it likely that after being back together for some time things will go back to the stale state they were in before?

[raggablue]

Maybe he didn't realise how he was, and her leaving him was a much needed wake-up call.
Just observe for a bit and if it sinks back into the loveless lull of before then advise her to think about leaving him, DON'T tell her to leave him, let her do all the deciding and just give your honest opinion or it might come pilling back on you if it gets nasty.

[nkychic]

Sometimes it takes losing something to know exactly what you've got and what you are willing to do to hang on to it. It sounds to me like he is giving an honest effort to try and earn her love and trust. People make mistakes, that's how we learn. There are a number of reasons he may not have been 'passionate'. It's not necessarily because he doesn't care about her. I say it's a 50-50 shot. It could work out great or it may end in heart break. Either way there will be a lesson there to be learned and it will be one that was worth the pain to get there. Just stay by her side. Support her decisions. Be honest with her, but watch what you say, you don't want to push her away. Be there for her babe and no matter what... things will work out for her.

<3 Leslie

[Braden23]

Okay, so here's the part I didn't tell you. She and I are co-workers and (if you didn't figure it out) were involved. I realize that my first mistake was getting involved with someone who was involved, and my second was getting involved with a co-worker. She and I were seeing each other while they were together and then she broke up with him, and for a while we were on, then we were off, and then we were on, etc. Her boyfriend has been trying and she is giving him a chance, and she has only recently gotten to the point where she can't be physical with me anymore. I guess I don't understand any of it. Why was she so hot before, and so cold now? Did the guilt eat her? If she can't be physical with me anymore, is it because she's seriously planning on getting back together with him, or could it just be guilt? I know that the best thing to do is just let it go, but it's hard because we work together and are in the same office. I almost feel like I should just stop talking to her at all, but I don't want there to be tension. Please, help.

[TrueFaith]

First off cheating is not good you going with her knowing she has someone else.
Should make you think of the typ of person your going with and the typ of person you are.

That said. I was kind of in the same boat. And I learnt from that mistake. Its just awful to be in.

First of all don't beat you self too much. She wanted it as well. Yeah it sucked she has a boyfriend but frankly its not his fault its her. She wants to have her cake and eat. And now she wants to give him another try. Well I say let her go man. Because trust me it won't work out. If she does that with her boyfriend she will do it with you.



And she will probable do it with somoeone else down the line to her boyfriend. As for the relationship lasting? Hmm as I said before she cheated on him before she will do it again. You going with her. No she will cheat on you. And you will never be able to trust her.

[talaniman]

She wasn't into him, and when she got tired of you, well you can figure it out. She will never be happy with one, so forget it.