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shae06 · Nov 15, 2007, 08:53 AM

My daughter is 17 months old now and her father and I have not been together since she was 2 months, he has done very little to help me since then. And I am currently engaged to the father of my second child which I am carrying now, which he wants to adopt my daughter and I know that my daughters father will not approve of. Can I take my daughters father to court and file abandonment since he does not help me finacially?

macksmom · Nov 15, 2007, 09:01 AM

To file abandonment charges the bio father has to have no contact and no child support for "x" amount of time (varies state to state). If he is AT ALL involved in the child's life, you cannot file abandonment charges.

Even so, abandonment charges do not terminate his rights if that's what you were hoping for. If he was found guilty of abandonment, then you could petition to have his rights terminated. And still, if he fights it... it won't happen.

Most states require that you be married (not just engaged) and require you be married for "x" amount of time before they would even allow adoption.

Bottomline, the child's father would have to willingly relinquish his parents rights to allow your husband (when you get married) to adopt.

ScottGem · Nov 15, 2007, 10:20 AM

Forget abandonment. If you read some of the many, many threads on this subject here and in the Family Law forum you probably wouldn't have had to post this question.

The bottomline here is that relinquishing parental rights is a difficult business. It is rarely granted and when it is, its almost always to pave the way for the adoption of the child by a stepparent or adoptive parents.

So the fact that your fiancée wants to adopt bodes well for you. You need to file a petition for adoption with your local Family court. I would wait until after you are married. Then get an attorney to do it for you. That attorney will also take care of the paperwork for the father to relinquish his rights.

Fr_Chuck · Nov 15, 2007, 01:42 PM

First 2 months is far from abandoment, esp if there has been some contact. Do you have a custody order in place, is there court ordered child support in place. If the bio father is not going to sign it over it won't happen.