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kim1975 · Nov 4, 2007, 12:48 PM

I have 3 children with estranged husband... Im not divorced yet, due to financial trouble. He doesn't work anymore, but I do. He owes quite a large amount of Child Support. He is getting an inheritance in paper check form due to his father's passing, March of 2006. It went through probate in New Jersey and he will be receiving it soon.
Although Child Support Enforcement is involved, they have told me they can't do anything. Do I need to seek a private attorney? Is there any other way to collect the support that is owed to my children, that doesn't involve a lawyer? Is there any agencies that help out in this department?

marzkizer · Nov 5, 2007, 05:05 AM

After we get over the issue the child support system is the most corrupt government agency in our nation - how often does your children get to see their father.

It is a proven fact the more uninterfered access a father has to his kids the easier it is to get financial help from the father.

Now we know a lot of mothers try to say fathers are abandoning children - but the fact is women are leaving families and children at an alarming rate. :eek:

May mothers try to say they do not keep dads from see his kids - but in a recent survey of 2500 women who had custody 96% answered at sometime they have used the kids against dad,

Where are you in this argument?

For a lot more on these subjects got to Kid Rights --- > krights.net

K_2 · Nov 5, 2007, 06:56 AM

Is a child support order in place?

The only thing I would think they could do is go to court and place a garnishment on his checking account so that once he deposits it, they get it. I am not sure how they would "intercept" the inheritance check.

Have you asked child support enforcement why they can't do anything? What was their answer?

Have you spoke with him to see if he plans to make his child support current when he receives the money?

kim1975 · Nov 7, 2007, 11:04 AM

He see's them every weekend, because I drive them over and pick them up. He has no car, and lives in a trailer... in a bad part of town. As far as Child Support, we did go to court and they were garnishing his wadges. That is, until, he quit working. I worry about the kids going over to see him now, however, because he just told me he is using drugs (Marijuana) and hanging out with some shady and scarry people. I don't want to keep the kids from him. I just want them to be safe when they are with him. As far as CSE, I will call them again, but they haven't been very helpful. Yes the ex states he is going to catch up on the retro, but he has been using it over my head as a way to get me to let him see the kids. I just worry, my 7 year old is regressing and when I spoke to him, he says "She'll be fine" and even her teacher has noticed a big difference.

cjonline · Nov 8, 2007, 10:24 AM

What a nasty thing for him to do but you have to put the kids first, not the money. So if your worried about his visitation see an attorney just to get their view on what would happen in court about restricting the visitation or have it someplace other than his home. Call around to see but many will meet the first time for nothing. He really should have a car if he has the kids for any length of time, some people find that important, and others don't. You might also try to get your child into counseling, have her talk it out with someone, maybe it will help her get through it. I don't need to tell you this but regressing is not good in any form.

This might back fire on you, but have you thought of asking your kids what is going on and if they want to go see dad or stay home? Sometimes giving the choice will take away most of the negative feelings. It helped my oldest to think he was in charge, therefore it wasn't so scarry anymore; it was up to him if it was happening. It's a trick his counselor told me to use. Like I said it might backfire and you would be stuck telling your ex that they didn't want to go and that might cause huge problems. Personally, I would go back to court and talk to the judge about your fears, there are things that can be done.

While your there address the support and the money he is getting.

kim1975 · Nov 10, 2007, 07:59 PM

Thank You. I just talked to her school counselor on Friday and after we talked for a good hour. She is sending my daughter in for an evaluation. She has seen some regressive and depressive behaivor. I just hope this can be reversed before it goes any further. I was told I should spend a day a week with her alone and do something fun that she would like to do. It will be tough finding the time (since I work alot) but I will just have to make it.

bushg · Nov 10, 2007, 08:16 PM

kim1975, please talk to your child. If the visits are not court ordered I would not allow him to keep my children, not because of the support issues but because of his choice of friends and mj use. Shady friends+mj can spell disaster for the children. I am sure when he is under the peaceful influence he is not as aware of what is happening to or with his children. He is more concerned with his high.