[wackymb]

Hi, I am wanting to lose some weight. I was very skinny but, after I had my first child over 4 years ago I gained a lot of weight. I joined a gym and lost about 20 pds. But, that doesn't seem to be enough. I only weigh about 185. I don't think I'm that big but, my husband always says bad remarks and tells me that I need to lose weight or he will leave me. I walk for an hour everyday unless it's raining or if I have something else to do. We don't make tea at home anymore and we don't buy cokes anymore. I increased my water in take. But, I do maybe drink 2 or 3 cups of coffee, but not everyday. I have to have something with caff. In it or I get these bad headaches. I'm not much on working out anymore. I don't have to the time or money to go back to the gym. I really want to get back to the size I was or at least around there and I want my husband to love my body again. What is the best way for me to lose weight and How can I improve on it without having to spend money? I really don't have the money to buy the diets foods or join any groups. Would like any inputs. And is there really any hope of losing this stupid weight? Would like to hear anyone's success stories. May help me. Thanks.

[grammadidi]

[quote=wackymb]... and is there really any hope of losing this stupid weight? [\quote]

Ummmm.. you could divorce him!

(Sorry, that was bad, but I couldn't resist! It irks the hell out of me when someone threatens to leave their partner because they are overweight. In my opinion, he's not much of a husband. What would he do if you had to have a breast removed or something?? Sheesh!)

It seems that you don't want to really work towards losing weight, so I doubt you will be very successful. It has to be something you want. You must find your own motivator - to be alive to see your kids grow up or grandchildren, to buy a new wardrobe, whatever works. Then you will find that you will eat healthy food (it's easier if you just don't allow it in the house) and exercise enough to lose the weight.

However, if you are happy where you are, then you will probably stay there.

Good luck!

Hugs, Didi

[wackymb]

[QUOTE=grammadidi]

... and is there really any hope of losing this stupid weight? [\quote]

Ummmm.. you could divorce him!

(Sorry, that was bad, but I couldn't resist! It irks the hell out of me when someone threatens to leave their partner because they are overweight. In my opinion, he's not much of a husband. What would he do if you had to have a breast removed or something???? Sheesh!)

It seems that you don't want to really work towards losing weight, so I doubt you will be very successful. It has to be something you want. You must find your own motivator - to be alive to see your kids grow up or grandchildren, to buy a new wardrobe, whatever works. Then you will find that you will eat healthy food (it's easier if you just don't allow it in the house) and exercise enough to lose the weight.

However, if you are happy where you are, then you will probably stay there.

Good luck!

Hugs, Didi

Thanks. I do want to lose weight, I just don't know what motivates me. I do walk every morning. I just get so tired through out the day and don't feel like doing anything else. My husband hasn't said anything in a while about my weight. And it hurt when he said that. And I told him that he isn't a spring chicken either. He just said that he said it cause he thought it would motivate me. Men are so stupid. I asked him if I was ugly to him to and he said No. That made me feel good. He does tell you the truth. What else do you think I can do to lose the weight besides walking? I don't like running. My friend wants to start running but, we both get out of breath so bad.

My weight is around 180 and I am 5'6, I think. I just want to lose the belly fat. That's the only part of my body that I don't like. I have an ab lounge but, I get dizzy on stuff that has you laying down and then coming up. I have pilates to, but have wooden floors and have a mat but, still hurts so bad. I want to lose about 40 to 45 pds. How long do you think it will take? I know that you can't rush things. We already been walking for 2 1/2 months and don't see any progress. We feel like we are gaining. Thanks for the input.

[grammadidi]

Well, the first thing that I think you should do is visit your doctor. If you are getting so tired through the day, dizzy when you are doing the ab work, and you feel like you are gaining weight despite good exercise, then there may be other issues there. It's always best to see a doctor before embarking on a weight loss regime anyhow. The doctor can tell you what the recommended weight for your age, frame and height is.

I believe that weight loss is best if it comes off slowly. If you have lost 20 lbs. already, then you may just be at a plateau right now. Swimming is a great form of exercise, too, because it gets your lungs and heart working well. Aquarobics can be wonderful because it feels easy and you don't feel pain! Also, make sure you eat properly! That is very important!

Please do see the doctor about being tired all the time though.

Hugs, Didi

[Bocasean]

I have a solid theory that focusing on "loss" of any kind will ultimately fail in the grand scheme of things.

It's obviously not working for you.

The best advice I can give on a short forum like this would be to shift your focus AWAY from losing or sacrificing or changing or simply not being good enough, and instead focus on building your body into whatever powerful engine you want it to become.

If you focus on a purpose that goes beyond appearance, you will find that results follow and they are of the permanent variety.

[wackymb]

I have a solid theory that focusing on "loss" of any kind will ultimately fail in the grand scheme of things.

It's obviously not working for you.

The best advice I can give on a short forum like this would be to shift your focus AWAY from losing or sacrificing or changing or simply not being good enough, and instead focus on building your body into whatever powerful engine you want it to become.

If you focus on a purpose that goes beyond appearance, you will find that results follow and they are of the permanent variety.

Thank you so much. I like your response. I have notice that if I keep thinking bad things that its not going to happen for me. Your right, I need to stop focusing on that my husband doesn't like they way I look. Cause honestly I am doing this for him. I don't think I am that big, really. But, I guess I am trying to make him happy so, he will make me happy. We have sex issues and I know its part of my weight. I need to stop thinking of him and consetrate on myself. Thanks. I'm glad to hear from a guy's point of view. I have another question. See I was a size 3 when I first got with him and then we ended up getting pregnant. That's where I got most of the weight gain. Anyway, I was wanting to have another baby but, he doesn't. Do you think it could be because he doesn't want me to get any bigger and would hate me even more? I know it's not a money thing. So, what else could it be? Thanks again.

[wackymb]

Well, the first thing that I think you should do is visit your doctor. If you are getting so tired through the day, dizzy wehn you are doing the ab work, and you feel like you are gaining weight despite good exercise, then there may be other issues there. It's always best to see a doctor before embarking on a weight loss regime anyhow. The doctor can tell you what the recommended weight for your age, frame and height is.

I believe that weight loss is best if it comes off slowly. If you have lost 20 lbs. already, then you may just be at a plateau right now. Swimming is a great form of exercise, too, because it gets your lungs and heart working well. Aquarobics can be wonderful because it feels easy and you don't feel pain! Also, make sure you eat properly! That is very important!

Please do see the doctor about being tired all the time though.

Hugs, Didi

Yeah, I know that I need to go to the doctor. I just can't afford it. My husbands not for sure If I have insurance cause his work messed up the application and we didn't even know that my son didn't have any and we had his teeth done and is ending up having to pay for the whole bill. It's a lot. In Jan. when he finally gets it fixed, I plan on going to get a full body check up. My paps is coming up but, I go to the health dept. for that. My body just has been messed up ever since I had my son. I think I might have diebetes. Some of my family members just found out that they have it and they are old. I get mainly dizzy if I don't have some kind of caffeine. Thanks for you concern and I do eventually plan on going and getting a check up. Have a good day. What is the best way to control my candy habits. If I see it, then I eat some. Now that it's halloween and we have all this candy, I can't control myself. I need to find a way to control my eating habits.

[grammadidi]

There is a form of diabetes that is directly related to weight issues, so you definitely need to see your doctor. As for the getting dizzy if you don't have caffeine - that is probably because you are suffering withdrawal. The best way to avoid that issue is to eliminate caffeine (which isn't good for you anyway!) from your diet - that includes pop/soda, coffee, tea and chocolate!

Again, take responsibility for your actions... you CAN control yourself!! As stated in other posts - love yourself and be positive! The best way to not eat the candy is to NOT allow it in your home! Instead of focusing on what you can't do, focus on what you can.

By the way, hon, if you can't afford to go to the doctor and look after yourself, then you really can't afford to get pregnant right now. Why don't you take a year or two to work on yourself esteem issues and learn how to communicate better in your marriage? That will provide a happier, healthier environment for your child and probably go a long way in convincing your husband that another child would be a good idea.

Hugs,
Didi

[N0help4u]

I agree with bosasean
I have tried and tried to lose weight and I finally realized it is more about trying to get your body fit than getting the flab off. That won't happen until you start to get your body fit.
Then the scale might not even reflect it cause while you might lose in your stomach the weight might still be there as muscle weight in your arms or legs or something. So don't get discouraged.
To do that you need detox your system and change your eating habits... not a diet but eat healthy and cut out ALL junk food, especially chips. Even nutri snack bars that claim to be healthy aren't.
Cut out anything with a long list of preservatives and sugars.
Eat a grapefruit
Switch to sea salt and whole grain.
Take omega fatty acids or flax seed oil
I also take chromimum picolinate.

I can't exercise either cause I get light headed, dizzy and have aches.
So I want to try doing BURST exercises.
You do something like running, going up and down steps, or running on a treadmill or
Weight machines as hard and fast as you can for 30 to 60 seconds and then take a two to three minute break and keep repeating for up to 10 minutes and do again in 48 hours--N0 sooner.

[tej deep ganesh]

Hi ,I think my piece would be a bit different and give good result. I prefer natural way of one becoming fit both mentally and physically to those of the artificial things and the science ,YOGA can well serve the purpuse. By doing yoga and a little,simple meditation, you can gain a lot of peace and fitness. If you don't know what yoga is, let me tell you this. It is a science of body,a science that helps to keep one fit by some simple excercises called ASANAS.you can get many boobks on it and no more pains of gym,no more troubles due to rain... OK... if goes good with you, fine,else ignore. I just felt like saying it.