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DonnieLSD · Nov 1, 2007, 09:33 AM

First, I need to tell the entire story so that you may get a feel of what's going on.

About a month and a half ago I applied for an Assistant Managers position at one of the larger grocery stores in my city. I interviewed for the position and a few days later they called and made me a job offer, which I accepted. I put in a 3 week notice to my current employer & purchased all new clothes so that I would be able to abide by my new employers dress code.

About 2 weeks ago, I went to the bar after work with a group of co-workers; I would like to mention that I work for a newspaper and all arrests are published. Our group had made our way to another bar and we all continued to have a good time. As the night went on I, of course, needed to use the rest room. I had gone to the rest room and was on my way out. I put my hand up on the door with a light smack, open handed causing no damage. A gentleman outside the door, waiting to use the facilities tapped me on the shoulder, said, "Hey, watch this." and then punched a hole in the door. I brushed this off and went back to a table of people that I know. When I went to the bar to get another beer the bartender told me he would not serve me because I had punched a hole in the door. I was confused and asked him, "I did what?" He told me that someone had told him that I had punched the hole in the door. I told him that I didn't. He proceeded to tell me that my had was bloody and to leave. That is not the case, I had sores on my hand from warts. I attempted to tell him what happened but he kept cutting me off and telling me to leave. I didn't leave, I went to wait at a table in an attempt to try and find a time to explain the situation. While I was waiting the police showed up and asked me to speak to them outside. One officer, who knew me from giving me a DWI, said they were there because I put a hole in the door and wouldn't leave. I explained to the officer that I didn't put a hole in the door. I made this statement to him, "I work for the [newspaper name] and I am getting ready to move to an assistant manager at [grocery store name]. Why would I do that?" He understood that I was referring to breaking the law when I know my name would go into my paper once arrested and cripple my chances of keeping my new job. The police officer instructed me to to leave for the evening and he would go in and talk to the employees, so that's what happened.

After those incidents, I assumed that everything was taken care of. Some of my co-workers wanted to go back to that bar the next week. I expressed that I was uncomfortable going there and told them the story. They agreed that it was all obviously taken care of, so I went back with them. I went to the bar to get a beer and the bartenders told me that I wasn't welcome and to leave. Not wanting to cause trouble, I went back to where my group was to tell them that I had to leave. While I was doing this, 2 of the male bartenders came back and escorted me out. I felt this was embarrassing and it did anger me. I started to voice my story again trying to tell them what happened the week before. During this verbal dispute, the volume of my voice had gone up out of anger, partially due to the fact that one of the bartender stated that he had a witness, then a few minutes later he had 3 witnesses, and then all of the sudden he had 5 witnesses. I called him out on his ever rising number of witnesses and he then kept quiet. Then one of the other guys out there asked, "Why is this all coming out now?" I was very angry and trying to explain very loudly. Then a guy behind me asked why I was yelling to which I replied, "I'm not yelling at you, I'm just talking very loudly." They told me to call the owner the next day and asked me politely to leave for the night. I agreed to this, went down the street and called a cab.

Now this is where the "slander" comes in. Yesterday, 2 days before my I end my current job, the grocery store management called me up and asked me to come back in for a meeting, to which I obliged. When I got there they sat me down and asked me about my DWI incidents; i answered and pointed out that I informed them of that on my application. Then they asked me about the "hole in the door" incident at the bar. Apparently the manager of the store and the owner of the bar are good friends, store managers words. I told him about the first night, somewhat reluctantly. He then told me that there was more to the story and wanted to know about the night from the next week, I was past the reluctant stage, and told him what happened. He said that he heard a different story. He said he was told that I punched a hole in the door and then refused to leave. He also said he was told that I came back the next week and attempted to start a physical fight outside his bar. After all of that He told me that he didn't believe that this store and I would not be a fit and retracted the job offer.

This is my dilemma, I know what he was told by the bar owner was a lie. I also wonder why this manager was the only person he told; I believe it was because of my conversation with the police officer, when I told him I was going to this store. So, the story that the bar owner cost me a job. Also, I have already given my written notice to my current employer and completed all but a few days of it. I will not be able to keep this job. And, since I left my job and was not release, I do not believe I qualify for unemployment to keep me afloat until I do find a job.

I believe the bar owner willfully perpetuated a lie that he knew was possibly untrue with malicious intent by telling my soon to be employer.

What do you think?

lobrobster · Nov 1, 2007, 09:55 AM

Wow! Amazing that such a small incident blew up into the big deal it did. Sounds like a pretty small town or community.

You won't want to hear this, but I think you're partly responsible. First, there was no reason to tell the police where you worked or were planning to work. Second, whether you did or didn't punch a hole in the door, the bar has the right to refuse you service when you couldn't convince them of your story. You should've just left for the night. That would've been the end of it, and you wouldn't have the problems you do now. The best thing to have done would've been to...

Leave as soon as you were asked to, let things cool down, and call the bar owner the next day (when you're completely sober), to explain the situation.

As far as slander, I don't think you have any case. It's basically your word against their's. It's unfortunate if you really didn't damage the door, but hopefully next time you'll learn to how to diffuse a situation. In this case, you made it worse than it was.

I know this isn't what you want to hear, but it's my honest opinion.

N0help4u · Nov 1, 2007, 11:02 AM

Lobrob said it all except I want to add that you can only sue for slander if there were monetary damages like lost wages, lost work, lost job directly caused by the slander. And you have to be able to prove amounts lost as a result.

DonnieLSD · Nov 1, 2007, 11:40 AM

I know that I shouldn't have went back, the police officer said that he would take care of the situation. Also, I didn't include this in the original post because it was already so long, but they bar refused to give me my tab on the first night and they charged my card with the price of the door. Between the police officer handling the matter and them charging my card for the door, it should've been squashed.

To add a little more: Like I said, they refused to give me my tab to sign on the first night. They told me not to worry about it. They then added on to my tab for the door. This is also illegal as I did not authorize it, there was no crime or arrest let alone a court ordered payment.

Sorry, I am venting a little bit. I understand all points of view, that's why I put this post up for other people's opinions.

J_9 · Nov 1, 2007, 11:43 AM

This is more of a case of mistaken identity rather than slander. With slander one would have to make up allegations that are not true at all. However, there is truth here, i.e. there was indeed a hole in the door. Whether you did it or not, there was one.

DonnieLSD · Nov 1, 2007, 11:56 AM

The reason I believe that is falls under slander is because everything the bar owner said is based on hear-say. Someone told the bartender I was the one who put the whole in the door, and the bartender told his version of what he was told, then the bar owner told my soon to be boss what he was told. That means there were 2 people between what happened and what the bar owner is saying happened. He knows that this could be untrue, which it was, and willfully repeated this to one specific person in an attempt, I believe, to get me in trouble because I wasn't arrested that night.

JudyKayTee · Nov 1, 2007, 11:57 AM

After those incidents, I assumed that everything was taken care of. Some of my co-workers wanted to go back to that bar the next week. I expressed that I was uncomfortable going there and told them the story. They agreed that it was all obviously taken care of, so I went back with them. I went to the bar to get a beer and the bartenders told me that I wasn't welcome and to leave. Not wanting to cause trouble, I went back to where my group was to tell them that I had to leave. While I was doing this, 2 of the male bartenders came back and escorted me out. I felt this was embarrassing and it did anger me. I started to voice my story again trying to tell them what happened the week before. During this verbal dispute, the volume of my voice had gone up out of anger, partially because one of the bartender stated that he had a witness, then a few minutes later he had 3 witnesses, and then all of the sudden he had 5 witnesses. I called him out on his ever rising number of witnesses and he then kept quiet. Then one of the other guys out there asked, "Why is this all coming out now?" I was very angry and trying to explain very loudly. Then a guy behind me asked why I was yelling to which I replied, "I'm not yelling at you, I'm just talking very loudly." They told me to call the owner the next day and asked me politely to leave for the night. I agreed to this, went down the street and called a cab.

I'm sure you realized this now but you should not have gone back; when asked to leave, you should have left - obviously your version of "talking loudly" is their version of "creating a disturbance." You admit you were asked to leave and then decided to explain yourself and "call them out." Your prospective employer might be concerned about what could appear to be a lack of good judgment and self control; also, with a previous DWI your employer will look at anything alcohol related very closely. By paying for the door you appear to be agreeing that you were responsible for the damage to the door. You could protest this charge with your credit card company but if you succeed you will probably be taken to Small Claims Court.

Only an Attorney can advise you concerning the rest of your questions.

ScottGem · Nov 1, 2007, 12:30 PM

I have to go along with the others. While what the bar owner did was malicious, there is no enough to prove it was outright lies.

You left yourself open to this. Whether you put the hole in the door or not, you should have left when asked. Leave under protest, but leave. Then not return to that bar unless you had straightened the mess out.

You can consult an attorney, but I doubt if he will tell you anything different.

lobrobster · Nov 1, 2007, 12:34 PM

Originally Posted by DonnieLSD

I know that I shouldn't have went back, the police officer said that he would take care of the situation. Also, I didn't include this in the original post because it was already so long, but they bar refused to give me my tab on the first night and they charged my card with the price of the door. Between the police officer handling the matter and them charging my card for the door, it should've been squashed.

To add a little more: Like I said, they refused to give me my tab to sign on the first night. They told me not to worry about it. They then added on to my tab for the door. This is also illegal as I did not authorize it, there was no crime or arrest let alone a court ordered payment.

Sorry, I am venting a little bit. I understand all points of view, that's why I put this post up for other people's opinions.

I understand your frustration. I really do. But you've got to look at this from other people's perspective. Even to us on this forum, there's the sense that something's not quite right. Kind of like the old "He that protest too much", adage. It's a bad spot to be in. At this point, the more you try to plead your case, the worse it's going to be for you. It sucks, but that's where you're at right now. So your options are:

1. Drop it and never patronize this bar again. This is preferrable unless it's a place you and your buds really like to hang out.

2. Call the owner during the day and have a heart to heart with him explaining your side of the story.

3. Find the guy who really did do it and make him fess up to it.

And on the outside chance you did do it, then your best bet is to admit it, explain it was an accident, apologize to the owner, and offer to pay for the damage and be allowed back.