[diva05]

So it all started my freshman year of high school... He was handsome, funny and had a great personality. We started talking on the phone and exchanging letters in the hallways and next thing you know we started dating. We had the best times together and I was his first true love and he was mine. He told me that he always wanted to be with me and so on and so on... At the time I was 15 and he had just turned 16 so some would probably think that it was just "puppy love" but I don't know. We broke up after 6 months in the relationship and two months later he started dating a girl that has been with now for the past 5 years until they broke up in December. I on the other hand didn't start dating until about a year later. Throughout the years and when we were in school he would always try to talk to me and hang out. Any new guys that would come into my life he was jealous of... he even egged my boyfriend's truck(yes I know it was immature). The last time he called me was about 3 years ago and I mainly talked about my boyfriend whom I've now been with for over 4 years.The last time I seen him was about a year ago and I could tell in his eyes that there were feelings still there. I feel like we could have been really happy together if we could have "seriously" dated. We never got to do stuff together because we were so young and his mom would ground him for stupid reasons. So now I found out that he got married a few months ago to a girl he has only known for 3 or 4 months and she's not pregnant or anything. So anyway we started exchanging messages over myspace... just friendly messages nothing like we were into each other or anything. And I sent him the last message and for some reason he won't answer me back... I don't know if maybe she didn't like us exchanging messages or maybe he just doesn't want to talk to me I don't know... I'm confused at what I did to him? What bothers me though is that I still love him even though it has been 5 years and I feel like there has never been closure. I'm also in a way confused about why he would marry someone he's only known a few months and on top of that she is not even pretty not that being pretty has to do with everything. I even know that he cheated on her a couple weeks before the wedding. Could he really love this girl? Even though he was my first love I just want to be friends and I'm hurt that he hasn't even replied to me. My head knows I could never be in a relationship with him but my heart doesn't understand why not... What is wrong with me?

[talaniman]

Your still acting on those old intense feelings, and things have changed. Stop acting on those feelings, and asking questions you can't answer. You have to let the past go, so you can have a future and happiness. For whatever reasons, leave him and his new life alone, and stay away from his business. Not healthy, no matter what you want from him.