[nicevenn]

I've been married for two months. My husband who is 14 years older than me has a lot of insecurity because his ex-wife (dragon lady) cheated on him multiple times.

I work in the information technology field which is largely male. In my department I am the only female. We get perks where I work such as Vendors taking us to lunch and a monthly "tech lunch". My husband goes crazy when I want to attend these lunches and sends me text messages and calls incessantly. He won't let me ride with my co-workers and says that I am having "lunch dates" with other men.

He want's me to give them up, but I don't feel like I am doing anything wrong. I get 60+ emails from him a day and I have tried to be understanding and have asked him to limit the amount of contact we have per day because my boss has said something to me about it already. Sometimes he just shows up at my office, he checks my phone and reads over my shoulder if I am checking my email. When I am not at work, I am with him 24/7. We go everywhere together. I never go anywhere.

I keep telling him that I am a professional and I always honor him and our relationship no matter what situation that I am in. I don't know what to do anymore, this is driving me crazy. What do I do?

[talaniman]

He needs help, or you must be more insistent (demanding) he back off. He still is carrying a lot of baggage, around and needs to get over it. Or he has always been like this, and is putting the blame on his ex. Either way it has to stop. Counseling or the door.

[startover22]

I agree with Talaniman, this is completely unhealthy for him and you. You don't want to go day by day living like this all the time. In all respects I bet he doesn't want to feel like this either. Usually a bit of counceling can help. I say counseling or out the door too! Good luck sweet.