[Tornandbroken]

Ok so I was in a very healthy relationship with this girl for a year and half and she broke up with me about 4 months ago pretty much for no reason at all. She would never give me a reason as to exactly why she left me thus I still have no closure on the relationship. Anyhow Im very much still in love with her and her daughter I did everything I could for the two of them from gifts to affection to love. I wanted to marry this girl and her daughter I felt was my own and wanted to be a dad to her. I went NC with her for a good two months then all of a sudden she randomly started texting me again telling me how much she misses me how much she loves me still but then ohhh yea I'm seeing someone else now but I'm not happy with him and you were my best friend and I really want us to stay friends. Now what I don't understand is how can this girl who knows I love her and her daughter more than life itself think I can possibly be friends with her knowing she is with some other guy? So I tell her all this and she stops texting/callin me for another month or so I tried making contact a couple times which led me nowhere. Now all of a sudden here she is again the same old I miss you I love you yadayada but yet she is still with this guy. What is she trying to accomplish here? Is she trying to hurt me more? Make me jealous? Play games with me to try and keep me around when she finnaly realises I was the best thing that ever happened to her and I know this because all her close friends have told me that ever since she left she's lost her apartment and is now back with at her mom's and is with this guy who doesn't even work nor really care about her daughter. I just really can't grasp why she is doing this, I cannot move on and attempt to get on with my own life when she keeps on doing this to me. And what hurts me the most is her daughter which when we got together was only 2 months old so I got to experience changing diapers , waking up at 2am 3am 4am 5am to give her a bottle just so my ex could get some sleep you know trying to do my best to show her that I wanted a life with them. Her daughter deserves the best in life and she is with some guy who isn't even working how in the world can he support them? I just don't understand if anyone has any advice at all as to what I shld do or go about this I would greatly appreciate it.

[talaniman]

You were far more emotionally involved than she was, and now she wants you in her life while she dates someone else. It may have started a healthy relationship, but it isn't now, and you need to leave her, and her daughter alone, and get on with your own life. Stop all contact with her, so you can work out your own feelings, without her confusing you.

[otisblue2]

My opinion she is holding on to you for a safety net when ever her realationship comes to a slow turn with this other guy she calls you to make her feel happy because she remembers the love and attention you you gave her and when this new guy starts to f up she's looking for you to make up lose all contact with her and move on she's using you

[jolienoire]

I think she realized she made a mistake, it is very hard to find someone as yourself from what you stated.. I don't know her motives, but she is trying to manipulate you to keep you as a friend in case things don't work out she has some type of stability. It is very hard out here to find a man that is willing to take on a woman and a child and do the things you have done for her. I think she has realized that. She is telling you about this new man so there are no secrets and basically so you know the situation.. So you can't throw it in her face later if you were to reconnect. I strongly suggest you do not keep any friendship with her, and move on. The relationship will not be the same, I know you love her daughter, but think about this let's say you find someone else but then you got her stringing along with her daughter.. Then you may have to break that relationship with her/daughter and the child will hurt... so just cut off the contact!