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keegansmom0310 · Sep 3, 2007, 07:00 PM

How do you go about getting someone to sign over their parental rights? My sons father has really had nothing to do with him since he was born he didn't even show up to the hospital until he was about 36 hrs old and he lives 5 minutes away from the hospital.. I don't receive child support, he has only taken him one weekend since he was born and he is 1 1/2 now, and that was over a year ago. He has told me he would sign off his rights if he could and I really want him to I have raised him on my own I can still do it on my own. Someone help me out!! Thanks Jessi

POWERSHAKER · Sep 6, 2007, 07:13 AM

Originally Posted by keegansmom0310

how do you go about getting someone to sign over their parental rights? my sons father has really had nothing to do with him since he was born he didnt even show up to the hospital until he was about 36 hrs old and he lives 5 mins away from the hospital.. i dont receive child support, he has only taken him one weekend since he was born and he is 1 1/2 now, and that was over a year ago. he has told me he would sign off his rights if he could and i really want him to i have raised him on my own i can still do it on my own. someone help me out!!! thanks Jessi

Some years ago, my second ex-wife and I spoke to an attorney together concerning our divorce. The subject of my previous marriage came up and the fact that my daughter was supposedly adopted by my first ex-wive's new husband's last name. It seems I signed a paper a long time ago - thirteen years ago to be exact - that transferred my parental rights to the husband and my first ex-wife. Well, the lawyer in the office told me that isn't legitimate. You cannot sign your parental rights away. It's very difficult to sever parental rights between the parent and child. Blood is thicker than ink. The lawyer told this, and said that I could get my rights back, because I wanted to get them back. I missed my daughter, and signing that paper was a big mistake. I cried many a night over my daughter - drank many a beer. Anyway, even if he signs his rights over, it may not stand up in court. What you have to do: legally adopt your own child. Lol I'm not joking. Then, if he gives up his rights in a formal adoption hearing with all the paperwork signed and delivered to the proper authorities, then he'll no longer be her legal father. Only biological. But, then again, isn't blood thicker than ink? Hmmm.

POWERSHAKER · Sep 6, 2007, 07:16 AM

Originally Posted by keegansmom0310

how do you go about getting someone to sign over their parental rights? my sons father has really had nothing to do with him since he was born he didnt even show up to the hospital until he was about 36 hrs old and he lives 5 mins away from the hospital.. i dont receive child support, he has only taken him one weekend since he was born and he is 1 1/2 now, and that was over a year ago. he has told me he would sign off his rights if he could and i really want him to i have raised him on my own i can still do it on my own. someone help me out!!! thanks Jessi

Oh, be careful! If you sign some paper, and he signs it, he can always still see her and have something to do with her, yet not have to pay child support. If I were you, I'd go for the money, and keep him as her Dad. Don't take her biological father away from her. You never know. One day he may have a change of heart, and I can't even begin to explain how very important a father is in a little girl's life.

excon · Sep 6, 2007, 07:28 AM

Originally Posted by keegansmom0310

how do you go about getting someone to sign over their parental rights?

Hello Jessi:

You can't. Rights can't be taken away. That's why they call them rights instead of privileges. But, it doesn't matter too much, because he isn't using the rights he has in the first place.

You DO need to take care of keegan financially, however. The only reason you DON'T get child support is because you haven't asked. It's TIME to ask. It ISN'T your money to turn down either. It's keegans! When he's an adult, and he finds out that you COULD have gotten help but didn't, he's not going to be too happy with you - nor should he be.

By the way, child support has NOTHING to do with visitation. I'll bet you didn't know that. Hire a family lawyer - TODAY.

excon

proudmother1020 · Sep 6, 2007, 09:29 AM

Originally Posted by keegansmom0310

how do you go about getting someone to sign over their parental rights? my sons father has really had nothing to do with him since he was born he didnt even show up to the hospital until he was about 36 hrs old and he lives 5 mins away from the hospital.. i dont receive child support, he has only taken him one weekend since he was born and he is 1 1/2 now, and that was over a year ago. he has told me he would sign off his rights if he could and i really want him to i have raised him on my own i can still do it on my own. someone help me out!!! thanks Jessi

Girl you get him to sign it one way or another. Take him to court do what you have to do. I´m on my way of doing the same thing. What matters most is your child not the father. Anyone could be a sperm donor but it takes a lot to be a parent

ScottGem · Sep 6, 2007, 10:03 AM

The best response you got was from excon. Severing parental rights, while possible is a difficult process. If the bio parent refuses to voluntarily relinquish there is not a lot you can do about it unless you can prove he represents a danger to the child, which doesn't appear to be the case. But, as excon also pointed out, he has, in effect declined to exercise his rights. So you gain little by trying to force a severing. What you should be concentrating on is getting child support from him.

Even if he is willing to sign, a court is not liklely to let him unless you remarry and your new husband wants to adopt. So I would just wait until that happens to do something about it.

ScottGem · Sep 6, 2007, 10:11 AM

Originally Posted by POWERSHAKER

The subject of my previous marriage came up and the fact that my daughter was supposedly adopted by my first ex-wive's new husband's last name. It seems I signed a paper a long time ago - thirteen years ago to be exact - that transferred my parental rights to the husband and my first ex-wife. Well, the lawyer in the office told me that isn't legitimate. You cannot sign your parental rights away. It's very difficult to sever parental rights between the parent and child. Blood is thicker than ink. The lawyer told this, and said that I could get my rights back, because I wanted to get them back. I missed my daughter, and signing that paper was a big mistake. I cried many a night over my daughter - drank many a beer. Anyway, even if he signs his rights over, it may not stand up in court. What you have to do: legally adopt your own child. lol I'm not joking. Then, if he gives up his rights in a formal adoption hearing with all the paperwork signed and delivered to the proper authorities, then he'll no longer be her legal father. Only biological. But, then again, isn't blood thicker than ink? Hmmm.

I'm not sure what your situation was or what this attorney told you, but it sounds like it wasn't exactly correct. A lot depends on where you live, and what you actually signed. While its true its not easy to server parental rights, it IS possible. Generally it happens when a step parent is wanting to adopt the child. So if that was your case and your ex's new husband did, formally and legally, adopt your child, then I doubt if you can get them back, especially after all this time.

And no, she would not have to legally adopt her own child, there is no such thing as that.

Originally Posted by POWERSHAKER

Oh, be careful! If you sign some paper, and he signs it, he can always still see her and have something to do with her, yet not have to pay child support.

Again this is not correct. If a parent does relinquish their rights and its accepted by a court, then they have can have nothing to do with the child without permission of the custodial parent. However, in most areas, they would still be responsible for child support.

ScottGem · Sep 6, 2007, 10:12 AM

Originally Posted by proudmother1020

girl you get him to sign it one way or another. take him to court do what you have to do. i´m on my way of doing the same thing. what matters most is your child not the father. anyone could be a sperm donor but it takes alot to be a parent

Unless the bio parent is a danger to the child, I see no value from entering into a court battle to attempt to sever parental rights. Most likely that will be a losing battle.