[Khaotic]

First off, let me apologize for the length. Just wanted to make sure I got as many details of my situation in here as necessary.

So I've got a girlfriend of nearly 3 yrs at the moment, who I definitely love. A couple months back she wasn't sure if she wanted to be with me anymore, explained what problems she had with me and we both agreed I'd work on those problems and give us another chance. Things worked out, I changed where I was previously neglecting her, and we both seemed to be happy with each other again. Recently, I've had a few issues arise with her, of which I explained to her my thoughts on certain things in our relationship. She seemed to acknowledge them, but nothing has changed and I see no desire for her to change. And here's where things start to get tricky.

My ex from a few years back has recently been popping up at the same places/bars I have been. Small town, I'm not hinting at her stalking me ;) One of my ex's best friends now works with my current girlfriend, whom I've never met before, however this girl went on and on about how she met me through my ex, and how my ex would talk about me a year and a half after we broke up. She'd show pictures of us together and tell stories of the things we did while dating. This is an ex that I was also very much in love with, but we parted ways due to her desire to find her place in life. It wasn't a bad break up by any means, but she did hurt me and we still agreed to try and be friends through it all. However, we haven't talked in years(3-4), and it is a very awkward situation when we run into each other in public. Over the past couple months though, when we do see her out with her friends, I get the impression that she's not happy seeing me with my current girlfriend. The ex and her friends try to belittle my girlfriend in an attempt to get a rise out of her. It's almost to the point that they're trying to start a fight with my girl, and it just seems as though my ex may be a little jealous that she's not with me.

Now to my dilema. Both these girls are gorgeous, and I'm really starting to wonder why my ex, week after week, refuses to pick up another guy, she could easily get one. So I've got it in my head that maybe my ex regrets breaking up with me and would possibly be interested in giving us another shot. Am I crazy? Now I love my girl, but issues I've presented to her that she doesn't seem willing to budge on make me wonder what a long term relationship with her would entail. Constant sacrifices on my end and complacency on hers? Whereas I'm still young and possibly have this other option out there with my ex, who was always a good time. I'm 99% sure contacting my ex will blow up in my face and could likely cause my girlfriend to take a walk, but I just can't get it out of my head what my ex is up to. Told you this was a twisted situation. Thanks in advance for any help or advice.

[innocent_101]

It does seems that your ex is jealouse, and if you were willing to make changes for your girl friend then she should do the same, my advice is listen to yourself, do what ever you feel that's right and that will make you happy. But I would talk to your ex and find out why all of a sudden she pops up and is causeing trouble for you and your now girlfriend before you make a choice to stay or leave your girl friend. I wish you Good luck and hope every thing works out for you.

[Khaotic]

So you think it would be best that I contact my ex while still dating my current girlfriend? That's kind of how I feel, but I've been on the fence about doing it or not due to the seemingly slim chance that my girlfriend might actually find out I talked to her. I'm sure my girl would be extremely upset if she found out since she really seems to hate my ex. I've been kicking around the idea of contacting her through email instead of a face to face meeting, this would likely allow me a little more anonymity. Thoughts? Thanks again.