[lostlove2]

Can someone tell me if anyone ever has a happy ending? Do any of you know of a case where a man left a longterm relationship that was a good one. Started dating someone else then realized he still loved his ex and came back and lived happily ever after. My God you would think in all the history of the world it would have happened at least once.

[Bluerose]

lostlove2,

I came close. Here's the short version. Married twenty years, brought up three kids, hubby a soldier who was seriously injured in Northern Ireland twice, reached a place where we had nothing left to give each other, kids almost grown, we decided to divorce, he remarried and divorced after two years, he was engaged twice but they didn't work out, I had one five year relationship with a married but separated man until he decided to get back with his wife, then ex-hubby and I went out together for just over a year, then we had 'the talk', we came to terms with everything, decided it wasn't us it was circumstances, we kissed and made up but decided to leave things as they were, he's with a nice woman now and still comes around to do his Santa bit for the kids and the grandkids, still buys me birthday and Christmas presents, I'm on my own now looking after a young grandson and doing just fine.

I hope that put a little hope in your heart. ;)

Stay strong and stay above the battles.

[lostlove2]

Thanks Bluerose,

That did help a little, I feel like sometimes no one on this site believes in love and mistakes. And that people in love can make mistakes and want to fix them.

[Capuchin]

I'm working on getting back with my ex who I left. I'll let you know if I get there ;P

[lostlove2]

I'm working on getting back with my ex who I left. I'll let you know if i get there ;P

Thanks Capuchin, keep me posted. What's your story if you don't mind me asking? How long were you together, how long were you brokeup, why did you breakup?

[Capuchin]

I don't really want to go into it here :). Sorry.

[lostlove2]

I don't really want to go into it here :). Sorry.

No don't be sorry I really understand I was just wondering if it was at all similar to my story.

[Bluerose]

So, lostlove2. Tell us a little about your story.

I don't mind talking about my guy. It was a while ago and old news really.

[GlindaofOz]

Yes my best friend. She was with her boyfriend for a bit of time roughly 6 months. She was very crazy about him and he decided that he was not ready to be in a committed relationship. He said he was still dealing with issues with his last serious girlfriend and disappeared. She went NC for about 3 months and he started sending her IM's and calling. She would take maybe 1 out of every 10 calls from him and when she took them would only talk to him for about 2 minutes. They worked up to actually restarting a friendship and then moved back into a romantic relationship. They're getting married in May.

I don't know how old you are but they're both in their late 20's early 30's so it came down to him being scared that he met the women he was going to marry so he bailed. Once he made peace with it he came back.

EDIT

However I would like to add that this is the first and only time I've ever seen people get back together after breaking up with good results. Usually its messy and bad and a huge replay of all the old issues and problems.

[lostlove2]

So, lostlove2. Tell us a little about your story.

I don't mind talking about my guy. It was a while ago and old news really.

I am 37 and he is 26. We lived together for 6 yrs and we had a great relationship, he left a little over 7 weeks ago to find himself but gave almost no warning. The only thing he seem to find since he left is another women. A girl he works with that somehow convinced him the grass is greener on her side.

[kp2171]

Well I can't tell you if it absolutely ends happy, as most relationships are dynamic and works in progress...

But my wife's friend was married with a kid. Her husband left her several years into the marriage... didn't divorce, but it wasn't a "trial separation"... they lived apart for about 1.5 years and now are back together and seem to have bridged the differences, which were mostly issues he had... the spark is gone kind of stuff.

I don't think he dated anyone, but I can't say.

Generally, I'm one of the people here who probably say move on with your life sooner than later. Lifes too precious and short lived to wait for someone to decide you are "maybe acceptable if theres nothing better around yet"... and then again I think its fine to wait sometimes, for a time, before you decide to pack it all up.

[lostlove2]

What causes someone who is happy in a relationship, laughing together, joking around, making love frequently, talking and being intimate to walking away to look else where?

[GlindaofOz]

What causes someone who is happy in a relationship, laughing together, joking around, making love frequently, talking and being intimate to walking away to look else where?

Because they weren't satisfied in that relationship or something made them not happy. You never know what someone is feeling. Someone can still enjoy being with you as a person and can be miserable in a relationship. When someone breaks up with you it seems as if its out of nowhere but that person didn't just wake up one morning and decide to leave you they have been thinking about it for a long time.

[Bluerose]

lostlove2,

"I am 37 and he is 26. we lived together for 6 yrs and we had a great relationship, he left a little over 7 weeks ago to find himself but gave almost no warning. the only thing he seem to find since he left is another women. a girl he works with that somehow convinced him the grass is greener on her side."

"What causes someone who is happy in a relationship, laughing together, joking around, making love frequently, talking and being intimate to walking away to look else where?"

He was only twenty when you got together. It could be that he realises that he is getting older, and that you are getting older, and he just wants to check that he's not missing out. I don't think there is any harm in letting him see that the grass may be greener on the other - but it's just as hard to cut!

I agree with kp2171, if there is a chance for it to work out all well and good. But if it looks like he has moved on you should too. But I disagree with moving on sooner rather than later. If it is over you are going to need time to grieve for the relationship's end. Life is precious and time is short but rebound relationships are usually more trouble than they are worth.

I agree with GlindaofOz. He has been thinking about it for awhile and if you look back you might recognise some signs. When one partner is blissfully happy it's easy to miss them. It happened to my youngest sister after six years of marriage. He just came in from work one day and said he had met someone else and he was leaving, packed a bag and left that night. She was in shock. They had no kids and both worked really hard to have a nice lifestyle. She was really happy. They haven't been able to speak ever again because it just shocked her so much.

Have you seen this thread. It might help to know how others deal.

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relati...ed-123862.html

[Jiser]

Four cases:

1) My mum's first husband they split up, he didn't speak to my mum for a year. Then they became good friends and he was allways with my family including my dad (I find it a bit weird)
2) My bst mates work colleague has three grown kids, he split with his wife for about a year and they both slept with different people whilst living in the same house. They got back together.
3) My auntie and childhood sweetheart (she married someone else), they got together in their late 30's early 40's - the childhood sweethearts that is.
4) My cousin split up with his girlfriend when he was 21 she was 18. They didn't speak for three years. Then she got in contact with him and they been together for 10 years now.

I think that's it. If I think of another one Ill let you know.