Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    CaptainRich's Avatar
    CaptainRich Posts: 4,492, Reputation: 537
    Cars & Trucks Expert
     
    #1

    Aug 14, 2007, 07:32 PM
    I love my cat, but.
    Excerpts from a Cat's Diary

    Day 983 of my captivity.

    My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

    They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.

    In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

    Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!

    There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

    Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow --but at the top of the stairs.

    I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches.

    The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

    The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now.. .
    Chery's Avatar
    Chery Posts: 3,666, Reputation: 698
    Gone, But Not Forgotten
     
    #2

    Aug 18, 2007, 04:51 AM
    Larry thought that was a cute one... so do I

    Am typing with one hand for a few weeks..

    C U on the forum

    CaptainRich's Avatar
    CaptainRich Posts: 4,492, Reputation: 537
    Cars & Trucks Expert
     
    #3

    Aug 18, 2007, 04:55 AM
    What's happened? Did you get caught under the rocking chair? LOL

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

My cat had 2 kittens they are 1 day old how long before my cat go's outside [ 7 Answers ]

My cat has just has 2 beautiful kittens she has been with them since she had them but she has come downstairs and seems to want to go outside they are just over 1 day old and both seem fine but I don't want my cat to leave them for to long. I'm not sure if she wanted to go to the litter tray as I...

Another cat added to house with a cat. Resident cat not happy. [ 8 Answers ]

Please would you kindly advise us on how we can help our cats get along together? My sister and I are proud owners of two adorable cats: my sister’s cat is a feisty female, 4 year old rescue cat long haired tortoise-shell, named Duchess. My cat is an 11 year old British Shorthair lilac male...

Love, understanding love, types of love [ 12 Answers ]

I thought this would be interesting to discuss. We all use love so much, we could say we love someone, then the next moment, we say we love our car, or wed love a big mac. I was watching this interesting video, in which this guy explained that the hebrews had 3 words for love. Raya- friendship...

Pregnant cat question(my 1st cat) [ 7 Answers ]

My kitty is pregnant ,kittens in like 2 weeks.. the male cat just hangs at my house stalking her,it seems like she doesn't like him anymore.why is he back now that she's not in heat? He won't leave.i don't no anything about cats ,please help..

Cat acting strange when bringing our cat we had before back home... [ 1 Answers ]

We have three cats; Kittie, Trinie, and Cleveland. The first two are girls and are younger than Cleveland by about 4 years. One of our cats ran away a month ago. I don't know how she got out but we couldn't find her anywhere. Yesterday she turned up in a neighbors yard, and then I brought her...


View more questions Search