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New Member
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Aug 14, 2007, 04:58 PM
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Im pregnant, and don't know who
I took a test and it showed I am pregnant. I have been trying to conceive with my husband, but I had sex with someone else only one time. We pulled out, but can I be assured it is my husbands?
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Ultra Member
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Aug 14, 2007, 05:01 PM
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 Originally Posted by firegal21
I took a test and it showed I am pregnant. I have been trying to conceive with my husband, but I had sex with someone else only one time. We pulled out, but can I be assured it is my husbands?
I have been trying to conceive with my husband but I slept with someone else... What?
You will never be assured unless they both do a blood test to make sure. (and that baby) Sheesh, If you want to have sex with someone else, don't try to have children with your husband.
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Ultra Member
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Aug 14, 2007, 05:01 PM
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The only way to be 100% certain is through a DNA test. Even though the other man pulled out he could still have released some fluid pre ejaculation that contains genetic material and can get your pregnant.
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Junior Member
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Aug 15, 2007, 07:23 AM
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Why would you sleep with someone else if you are trying to get pregnant with your husband? Good luck to u
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Ultra Member
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Aug 15, 2007, 07:27 AM
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Saw this on some discovery show. Sperm are competitive with other sperm (other mans sperm) will race, block, stop to get to the egg. Could very well be either. If you want to be sneaky, get amnio done and get sample from hubby.
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Ultra Member
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Aug 15, 2007, 07:27 AM
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 Originally Posted by GlindaofOz
The only way to be 100% certain is through a DNA test. Even though the other man pulled out he could still have released some fluid pre ejaculation that contains genetic material and can get your pregnant.
Yes the test... Please forgive me, I was way too quick with my words.
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Ultra Member
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Aug 15, 2007, 07:47 AM
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When you go to the doctor they will tell you how far along you are and most likely tell you when you conceived... although sometimes that's not always right. It may be as simple as that... if you slept with someone else a few months ago... but you find out you are only a few weeks pregnant, then obviously it's your husbands. However, if you slept with this other man and your husband both around the time you conceived, it could be eithers and you would need to get a DNA test.
If you infedility is something you are not wanting to confess to your husband, you could speak to the other man, once the child is born, and have him get a DNA test to either include him or rule him out.
Either way, you will want to get it done... I'm sure if you do nothing, it will haunt you.
Good luck.
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Gone, But Not Forgotten
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Aug 15, 2007, 08:04 AM
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This is caused by not thinking and now you are forced to think about more than what you planned.
First, think of if and when you are going to tell your husband of your fears.. Will he hate you for cheating on him, taking away the joy of becoming a father, denying him the fun of surfing the net, following up on 'his' baby's development.
Not to mention an uneventful and enjoyable pregnancy for you.
How about this other guy. Will you tell him? Do you think he will surf the net on a journey of becoming a possible 'proud father'?
I'm sure that you have asked yourself these questions already, just wanted to let you know that they are justified by you and I hope that you find a way to do what's right for you to do.
The only thing you can do to be certain is to have a DNA test done when it is possible and medically feasible so as not to harm you or the baby.
It's a hard time coming and we understand your' helplessness, and I hope that you will find a way to accept it and cope with it.
Good luck.
 Keep us posted.
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Survivor
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Aug 15, 2007, 09:18 AM
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You're not alone in your question. A lot of people here need to be educated on how unreliable the pullout method is.
DNA is the only way.
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Expert
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Aug 15, 2007, 11:42 AM
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 Originally Posted by danielnoahsmommy
if you want to be sneaky, get amnio done and get sample from hubby.
I am sorry, but I have to respectfully disagree with this. The risks of amnio are way too serious to do it strictly for DNA purposes, one risk is miscarriage. Most respectable doctors will not do an amnio for paternity results anyway.
As for getting a sample from hubby, won't this raise suspicion?
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Ultra Member
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Aug 15, 2007, 11:47 AM
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As J-9 said, they will not do amnios for paternity. The only option is to have a dna test done when the baby is born. If you know your husbands blood type, it is possible you could find out depending on the baby's blood type without asking for sample from husband. But this will only work if the two men are of different blood types... and even then, I would feel horribly guilty sneaking around.
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Full Member
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Aug 15, 2007, 12:11 PM
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Based on timing of your affair, only you know if it is possible the other man can be the father. I am guessing by the fact that you asked, you have considered that the timing of conception is at or very close to the time you had sex with the other man. If you had intercourse with the other man before you had your last period, then chances are that it is your husband's child. But if you have not had a period since you did, then you will probably have to wait until the baby is born.
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Ultra Member
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Aug 15, 2007, 12:48 PM
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I'm sorry this has happened. Maybe the best outcome will occur. You just have to ask yourself now. Now that I am pregnant. Just why did I cheat on my hubby. Out of fairness for the soon to be tot, I would do some self reflection as to that ?
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